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stusbunker · 5 months ago

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Spotless: Obbligato

Chapter Twenty Nine

Featuring: Dean Winchester/Reader, Dean/Bela

Other characters: Tiny, Crowley, and Sera the venue lady, both bands in the background, faceless fans

Word Count: 3162

Warnings, etc: Mutual pining, mention of past Dean/Annie, friends who do not have the whole picture and are therefore quicker to judge each other aka drama

Series Masterlist

You exhaled and put your phone in your back pocket. Donna was dancing on the side of the stage closest to you, swaying with her guitar, ruby red lips smiling bright. It was a stark difference to the mindset the two bands had been in only an hour ago. God, everyone had been so scared. You felt like you should be doing damage control, but with investors and who’s-who’s brushing elbows in the VIP you had to save face. No one could know Dean had been missing.

Not even Bela.

Naturally, she found that moment to reappear. “Everything alright?”

You shook your head to clear your thoughts and smiled. “‘Course. Find anything good?”

She smiled wickedly at you and handed you a proper martini from the bar. “We’ll see, won’t we?”

Once you had a good handle on your cup, she held hers up and you clinked the glasses together. “Cheers.”

You took a big gulp and winced at the amount of olive juice, but the burn of the Gin more than made up for it. “Uh, yeah, cheers.”

Bela giggled and turned to watch as SPS finished their set. They were slowly wedging their ways into PT’s fans’ hearts and playlists. You had seen some chatter from the fan pages, plus Becky had posted a lot of supportive tweets about them once it was announced they would be along for the whole tour. It was easy to see them keeping in touch after this tour, they already felt like family.

It was only the second night and this tour was shaping up to be something memorable, something pivotal, maybe even historic.

“They’re killer,” Bela seemed to be reading your thoughts.

“Yeah.”

“You said they’re Canadian?”

“Well, mostly. They’re based in Vancouver, but Patience and Jody are from the U.S.”

“Huh. And it was Dean’s call to have them join on?” Bela played with her cocktail spear as she spoke, the stadium around you moved as a whole in the intermission.

“Well, he suggested ‘em. The suits make all the real calls.” You took another sip, feeling like she was going somewhere with this.

“Naturally. Well, that was— progressive of him.”

You felt your face drop in surprise.

“What?!” She asked like you were the one being rude.

“Why did you say that like that?” You felt oddly defensive of SPS all of the sudden.

“I didn’t mean anything bad— I wasn’t disparaging the other band, Y/N. I was just saying— that it was a good mark of his character. It was meant to be a compliment— I swear.”

You exhaled.

She reached over and squeezed your forearm. “You need to relax, love.”

You nodded, still a little dazed by the dred that had crept out of her best intentions. “I need a fucking nap, but this’ll do for now.”

Bela hummed in agreement.

The VIP attendees doubled the closer Phantom Traveler’s set loomed. You made sure to stay close to the edges and to keep Bela within Tiny’s range. The amount of gawkers that had needed to be escorted along were weighing at the back of your worries. But you trusted security to do their job, you had enough to monitor as it was.

You and Bela took a few selfies with the stage in the background while you waited, both of you falling into the trap of your phones until the lights signaled it was time for the show to start. From somewhere backstage Lee’s voice reached across the stadium and welcomed everybody for the night. The opening bars of ‘Black’ started, which meant Dean and Sam were starting this one off together and then everyone started to scream over the first verse and Dean’s husky opening. But between the love of the song and the dramatics of Charlie’s lighting you couldn’t blame them.

They were solid. Though Dean was ultra focused, less playful than the show the night before.

You weren’t the only one who noticed the change. “Looks a little pale up there, doesn’t he?”

You spun on your heels and smiled brightly at Crowley. “Hello! Sorry I didn’t see you come up. Bela, this is Mr. Crowley from the label.”

“Charmed,” Crowley replied, leaning down to kiss Bela’s outstretched knuckles. “Dick said you were lovely and you’d be sticking around, but I just had to see it for myself.”

“Did he? Well I’m glad to hear Mr. Roman is on Team Tal-chester,” Bela snarked back.

“Aren’t we all?” Crowley deadpanned.

Oh, this was going to give you a migraine. Dean’s voice spoke to the crowd, but you couldn’t spare the attention to hear the introduction to the next song. You had to be focused on what was happening in front of you.

Bela asked about Gavin, who she had met in passing the night before. Crowley was as smug as ever, and gave little besides slight jabs and open ended questions back.

“How are things looking now that the tour has started?” You jumped on the first business notion that came to mind.

Crowley’s dark eyes danced from you and back to Bela, almost chagrined to talk shop. “Pre-orders of the album are up twelve percent since last week. But, uh, let’s talk ticket sales and press junkets on Monday, shall we? Don’t want to miss the rest of the show that we’ve all been waiting so patiently for.”

You gave him the grace to step away, maybe too easily. “Of course, I’ll be on the call from the hotel in San Diego.”

“Right. Well, goodnight ladies, I hope it is— fruitful for you both.”

You and Bela both plastered on your best smiles and waved nervously until he was out of sight.

“What a git,” Bela muttered.

You couldn’t disagree, but suddenly you were hit with a burst of applause. Dean’s voice was crooning, holding a note from one of the new songs and then everyone stomped on the last note.

“‘Pushing Through’ everybody,” Dean said simply and pulled back to let Lee take the front of the stage.

Kicking yourself for missing the live premiere, you nodded Bela closer to the ledge to get a better view of the stage, while hopefully minimizing your distractions. Tiny followed four paces back, large and lurking, ever present and professional.

Lee chatted the crowd up and then they slid into ‘Breakdown’ from their third album which was about a tour bus’ flat tire and also about how they first started noticing Sam’s struggle with the harder stuff. Pam kept the drums going as they moved into ‘Lost and Found’, their first ever single. The song that got them noticed by Crossroads in the first place.

By the time they dove into ‘No Regerts’, a tongue-in-cheek song that only made it on the same album as ‘Breakdown’ as a hidden crack track, Dean was looking more alive on stage. That irresistible smile was noticeable even from two levels up. Pam and Kevin walked them out of that song with an almost marching fanfare, spirits were up.

You tried to breathe and forget about Crowley.

‘Twigs and Twine’ set up nicely into a cover of ‘Funk 49’ by the James Gang, which everyone really had fun with. Dean ended up practically jiving with Pamela as she rocked out with the blocks. Lee added his own little drawls to the familiar riffs, which you knew meant he was having a blast. You slowly let go of the panic Dean’s absence had caused, but the knowing glint in Crowley’s eyes was harder to shake. The energy on stage was even drawing in the uppity-ups in VIP.

You were so proud how the band had come together, yet again to give it their all.

For some reason, Bela continued to hit each of your raw nerves. Nothing she said or did was actually offensive, but somehow her very presence felt like a burden. When she gestured that she was going to go mingle during ‘Damned’ from their third album you just rolled your eyes, but nodded that you’d be okay where you were. Tiny was keeping her in his sights anyway, no reason you had to abandon the show to socialize with people you never fit in with in the first place.

Sam burst through the tail end of ‘Damned’ with a line both funky and familiar and the way Dean and Lee whipped their heads around you would have thought it was a shock. But you also knew that Sam knew better than to fuck with his brother’s setlists. They were just playing it up that Sam went from a song off the album that marked his darkest days to a feel good number from their first album. ‘So Co in So Cal’ was laid back and celebratory, a summer drinking song at its finest.

You raised your glass and danced in place, feeling the rhythm and loving the way the band slipped into the emotions of each song. Two songs later and before you realized it, they were welcoming Annie onto the stage for the last official number.

Bela returned as Annie was greeting the crowd, while effortlessly teasing Dean just like the night before.

“They’ve got quite the chemistry, don’t you think?” Bela’s voice appeared beside you.

“Yeah, but nobody can call your bullshit like family,” you agreed.

Bela smirked. “I know chemistry like that, Y/N, especially amongst performers. And those two have seen each other naked, nobody looks at each other with that kind of devilish mirth without having done the deed.”

You couldn’t help but laugh, that was ridiculous. She was like their aunt! But then the conversation the teens at the animal shelter had way back when popped into your mind about Sam and Annie having a fling. And as pissy as Cas’ niece was, she wasn’t a liar. Something like dread washed down your back and settled traitorously in your stomach.

Bela just gave you a ‘I told you so’ look and turned to watch the duet.

You felt like you didn’t know Dean at all. Not that it mattered who he slept with, that really wasn’t your business. But Annie married Bobby. It was weird to set up your surrogate uncle with an old fling, wasn’t it?

Not to mention Sam. Wait which one went first? Did they share? Your brain spiraled into chaos scenarios and you needed air. You figured there was twenty minutes of encores to come, so you bowed out of the VIP and told Bela you were going to make sure the signing room was set up.

Smiling at the venue security as you went, the agenda for the rest of the night took over inside your mind. Autos and afterparty, the real private afterparty with the band’s inner circle. Making sure everyone knew when check out was and when to meet at the busses. Touring was like riding a bike, this time you just had to keep Bela on your radar and make sure her and Dean made nice with the fans. Everyone else you trusted. Not that you didn’t trust Bela, or Dean, for that matter, it was just the focal point. Their relationship’s success held your professional reputation in its grasp.

And Crowley knew it.

The venue had done a better job creating a flowing line for that night’s autographs. So you just carefully counted chairs and security guards to kill time. Sera burst in just as you heard the heavy thunder of stomping feet signal the true end of the show. You smiled at her and made small talk. She seemed ready to be rid of you, and the band, more than accommodating, but you didn’t take it personally. You knew how stressful it was coordinating these things. That she, too, had people she had to answer to.

The winners from the local radio station were escorted in first, followed by some of the higher ups in the fanclub, and people who paid through the nose for the opportunity. You smiled and nodded at the few who waved at you. Some of the fan club recognized you from a spotlight Becky did on you for her newsletter before the last tour.

It was odd to have such an active and loyal group of fans in the social media age, but somehow PT inspired it more than most.

Then a wave of cheering and clapping broke you out of your thoughtful appreciation. Kevin led the way as the band smiled and high fived their way behind the row of tables. Sam must have just put on a tank top, though sweat dampened even the fresh fabric where it clung to his abs and between his shoulder blades. Pamela rocked a pair of shades that she probably grabbed off one of the security guards. A signature move of hers that she adapted after the one tour when Cas almost blinded her with the old shaving cream prank.

God, you missed him and all his pierced glory.

Shaking your head, you waited as Lee posed for quick selfies with the group at the front of the line. That only left Dean. Spotting Bobby rounding the corner you made a beeline behind the band’s chairs.

“Where is he this time?” you demanded.

Bobby huffed. “Your bestie asked for a ‘quick mo’.”

You groaned. “Of course she did.”

But before you rifled up the nerve to go interrupt whatever they were up to, Dean appeared from the opposite direction of the dressing rooms with Donna and the rest of SPS behind him. He smiled at you like a petulant child and squeezed your shoulder as he slid past the fans and down to his seat at the far end of the row.

You exhaled and tried to keep your face optimistic as the opening band also gave you apologetic faces. The meet and greet passed in a blur. Just before the mingling portion was set to wrap up, Bela slinked in with a fresh wave of perfume and a killer’s glint in her eyes. You grabbed her by the elbow before she could interrupt Dean and Sam making nice with a set of four college-aged girls in matching PT swag.

“Hey, just give them a few more minutes and we can all head to the afterparty together.”

“It is so dull waiting around, can’t I just pop in for some photos, too?”

You tried not to make a face, but Bela knew you too well to hide your annoyance from her.

“Come on, Y/N. It’ll be alright. Guards at every exit, don’t worry.”

“I’m not worried about the fans, I’m worried you’ll make a scene. Dean’s not the only member of the band, they all like time with the fans.”

“Make a scene? You do not want to challenge me to cause a ruckus, dear.”

You closed your eyes and bowed your head, releasing your hold on her arm. “That’s not what I meant, just leave him be for a few more minutes. Okay?”

Bela seemed to weigh her options and conceded. “Fine, but we’re taking my driver to the hotel and not bothering with the hired muscle.”

“We or you two?” you clarified.

“The happy couple,” she said with all teeth.

You nodded and gestured for her to head back the way she came, probably the dressing room, since the VIP had probably been cleared out by the venue staff at that point. Once the fans were escorted out of the space, you reminded the band to clear out the dressing room. Benny had a platform dolly waiting for their concert baggage and gear.

You needed some air, so you decided to wait for everyone outside, which was better than trying to navigate the parking garage like a civilian. Naturally, Bela and Tiny spotted you as they stood on the curb beside a freshly detailed limo.

“Is he coming?” Bela bellowed, her words were surprisingly slightly foggy from the late night chill.

“Gotta clear out the dressing room,” you said as you approached, arms wrapped around yourself to keep warm.

Groups of people still littered the sidewalk and walked by, trying to decipher which car that was double parked was their ride.

“You know you baby him too much, he doesn’t need a nanny. He’s a grown man,” Bela said, seemingly out of nowhere.

“It’s kind of my job, so—.” You shrugged it off.

“No, it isn’t,” she said firmly.

Christ, you were so over tagging along and it was only the second show she was scheduled to make an appearance.

“Listen, you know what’s been going on, it’s better for me to be ahead of anything than to play clean up.”

“Or you just like to be in everybody’s pocket.”

Your head snapped up to glare at her. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Look, Y/N. I’ve been around awhile and it’s not with everybody, all the time.--- I don’t know if it’s leftover guilt or what, but you literally insert yourself into every minute of Dean’s life. Even when you’re not there, you’re there. And no matter what you do, how hard you work, or how much you care it’s not going to bring Jo back.”

You recoiled like she slapped you across the face.

There were no words for how far she had taken it, how much it hit every single one of your insecurities. You were a busybody, a hanger-on. Nothing could fix the past. You had taken away any chance for Dean to be happy. You had killed your best friend.

But she hadn’t said what the worst of it. The dirty little secret that you weren’t able to keep from the likes of Cas or Bobby, the people who truly knew Dean. And that was how you felt about him, how much you wanted him to look at you the way Bela claimed he looked at Annie.

You tried to dispute it, but the words caught in your throat as the tears burned in your eyes. Tiny approached and cleared his throat, warning you of an approaching crowd. The nearest exit burst open and a rush of photographers appeared around the corner, as the band and their crew made a beeline for their waiting vehicles. Dean had thrown on a jacket, collar popped high as he kept the paps at arm’s length.

You cleared your throat. “I don’t know what your problem is, but we put a lid on it for the rest of the night, got it?”

“Happily,” Bela replied, not looking at you but at the wave of reporters and flashing cameras as they followed Dean’s progress to the curb.

You watched dumbfounded as he kissed her hello, nodded over her shoulder at you, then held the door of the limo open for her to crawl inside. Tiny kept the vultures at bay and you followed him to a discreet SUV around the corner where Annie, Bobby, and Victor waited.

At least somebody cared that you had a ride.

Tagging:

@deans-spinster-witch

@mrswhozeewhatsis

@cosicas-cuquis

@fics-pics-andotherthings-i-like

@suckitands33

@ladysparkles78

@deans-baby-momma

@stoneyggirl2

@sassy-pelican

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@winharry

@lastactiontricia

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@coldhearted93

@djs8891

@beautiful-places-blog

@n-o-p-e-never

Chapter 30: Larghetto

#spotless series #dean winchester fanfiction #dean/reader #dean/bela #rockstar au #fake dating #slow burn #dean angst #spn au #spn fanfic #supernatural fanfiction #dean x reader #dean x you #rockstar!Dean

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year2000electronics · 27 days ago

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I’m also gonna propose the OTHER side of the coin.

Mom!Tippi

Wouldn’t it be so tragic if Timpani had been that much closer to Bleck this entire time? If potentially Luigi were to meet and befriend her, neither having the slightest clue who the other is, prior to the events of SPM? And by the time they do all realize who everyone is and fully reunite, they only have like 5mins max to cherish it before two of them have to sacrifice their lives to save the third :)

Then on the other hand it’s also lowkey kinda hilarious?

Tippi is just kinda going through the motions with the prophecy. No memories and very little sense of self, she’s putting all her focus on the Pure Hearts and stopping the Void. Very… clinical-like. And gradually she starts to open up more to Mario & Co, grows a bit more lively and starts remembering things.

Like her lost love.

So imagine her surprise as things are starting to click and she’s piecing things together, and for the latest piece to the puzzle, there’s her exchange with Bleck when the group’s confronted by the Count in Sammer’s Kingdom. And then he not only mentions the name “Timpani”, which is very familiar for some reason, but also mentions a son.

There are many questions once she’s got her full memories back. At least she thinks so, but she certainly doesn’t remember having a child with Blumiere before they were torn apart and she was cursed to wander dimensions forever! Who IS this child? Where did he come from? What does this mean? Does this make her a mom? Will the child want her as a mom? Can she be a good mom? This was way less terrifying and complicated when it was just saving all reality from violent oblivion!

At first she thinks it’s Mr. L based off observations from the heroes’ fights against him. But then surprise! It’s actually Luigi! The sweetheart boy she’s known and befriended a few years prior to the adventure… how they were this close to have preventing it altogether had they figured it out sooner.

Picture the final thing that confirms for them both without a doubt their shared connections to Blumiere with the MOTI song that’s the duet to the Memory/Bounding Through Time track. A cherished melody between the lovers when they were together, that was also used as a lullaby for Luigi as a kid when he had nightmares.

Btw Luigi and Tippi being amnesia buddies throughout Ch7 Underwhere and Overthere segment is super cute. Criminal that this wasn’t capitalized on in the game either, like c’mon! Amnesia Buddies! Just supporting each other and helping the other get through the more intense flashbacks when they hit in addition to quest/adventure stuff.

Makes Luvbi’s teasing comments hinting that Tippi’s got a crush on Mario, Luigi or both a lot more awkward, tho.

That awkward moment when you accidentally call your mom friend “mom” out loud to their face, but it later turns out she was your actual mom the whole time.

It’s hard to hug on account of Tippi being a butterfly Pixl, but she carries the intent when she sits on Luigi’s nose and stretches her wings out across his face as best she can.

…I have far too much to say on potential relationships between characters that barely interact canonically.

AW YES... let tippi and luigi bond theyve earned it

i think the funny thing about that, too, is that even though tippi and luigi don't get much together, tippi does have some VERY strong opinions on mr. l (calling him greasy, saying he's weak, and her tattle on him specifically says he has 'no other outstanding features of note') so if she thinks mr. l is bleck's son (instead of luigi) i'm sure her first reaction would be... Interesting... LMAO

#mothra answers #my art #super paper mario #mario #dad bleck

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soapsbaby · 1 year ago

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☆ Day 2 // Praise // König ☆

Summary: He loves to praise you and everything you do.

Characters: König x Reader

Themes: nfsw (mdni), oral (m receiving), PIV, size difference, lots of praise, overstimulation, unprotected

Word Count: 1500

The moment the door was shut behind you, König had you pushed against the wall, his huge frame towering over you.

“Finally I have you to myself, mein kleiner Spatz.” (my little sparrow)

His voice was deep, quiet enough that you could barely hear him, but still clear enough that every single word made you shiver.

He had to bend down so that he could lift his mask, pull you in for a kiss.

The desperation between the two of you was palpable, all day you had been teasing one another without a way to actually release the tension between you.

It was almost ten at night now and the last meeting was finally over and you had been able to sneak away to his room without anyone noticing that you were together.

His big, gloved hand gently pushed a strand of hair behind your ear as he pulled away from you, the fabric of his mask falling over his face again.

The look in his eyes was soft, gentle.

"You're so fucking beautiful.", he said quietly, his hand gently cupping your face.

"Oh, shut up."

You felt your face flush bright pink, struggling to keep eye contact with him.

"No… No, never."

He tugged on your shirt until you lifted your arms, letting him take it off. You were only in your underwear and your skirt now, a skirt that was technically too scandalous to wear around the base but that no one had called you out on yet.

You knew the effect it had on König, that’s why you took the risk of being reprimanded.

His hands snaked around your back, skillfully unhooking your bra and letting it fall to the floor with the shirt.

“So gorgeous.”, he muttered as his hands gently cupped your breasts, sighing as he kneaded your soft skin between his fingers.

Even with the mask you knew there was a smile on his lips as you dropped to his knees in front of him, never breaking eye contact.

He sighed softly as you unzipped his pants, finally freeing him from the tightness of his boxers, pulling them down his legs so he could step out of them.

"I've been waiting for this all day.", he said, hand still cupping your face as if he didn't want to let go of you.

You gulped as his erection sprang free. It didn't matter how many times you had seen it, the size surprised you every time.

He watched intently as you wrapped your hands around him, giving him a few strokes. Both of your hands still weren't quite enough to grasp all of him.

"Shit…", he muttered under his breath as you ran your tongue across his entire length before wrapping your lips around him.

"So fucking beautiful."

You looked up at him, meeting his gaze as you took him as far as your throat allowed you, bobbing your head and coating him in your spit.

"Always so good for me.", he said, you knew even from just seeing his eyes that there was still a smile on his lips.

His eyes fell shut as you moved your hands again, twisting around his shaft as your tongue circled the head of his cock.

"You're so perfect."

One of his hands grabbed a fistful of your hair, not using it to move you, just to have a grasp on you.

He let you set your own pace, just watching you, quiet moans escaping his lips.

You gagged as he hit the back of your throat, too big for him to take all of him.

“I’m sorry, Baby. You’re doing so well.”, he said quietly, the strain obvious in his voice. “But I need to fuck you so badly.”

You nodded as you got back on your feet, legs a little shaky, thinking of what would be next.

He pushed you onto the bed with a gentle shove.

You watched in awe as he gave his cock a few pumps before crawling onto the bed with you, towering over you in both height and size.

“Open your legs for me, Maus.”, he said softly, smiling as you followed his order immediately. There was a bit of embarrassment of baring yourself to him like that, but it subsided almost immediately when he crawled on top of you, fingers gently teasing the hem of your panties.

With a smooth tug he pulled them down your legs, discarding them.

His fingers were back under your skirt immediately, parting your folds.

“Shit…”, he hummed, his masked lips pressed to your neck. “So wet for me already… You enjoy sucking me off that much, hm?” Your eyes had fallen shut, cheeks bright red at his teasing, but you nodded.

“Such a good girl… And just for me.”

You gasped as two of his fingers entered you, curling up to give you the maximal amount of stimulation he could.

“Just for you.”, you echoed.

He had been right about how much it turned you on to please him. You loved his taste, the way he felt, the noises you were able to draw out of him with your lips, your tongue, your hands.

But most of all you loved the way he spoke to you, the way he praised you.

It drove you insane and it made you always do your very best to gain his approval.

You whined as he drew his fingers out of you, slipping his hand under his mask so he could taste you.

“You taste like fucking honey.”, he said quietly before he was on top of you again, lifting his mask so he could kiss your neck, sucking your skin hard enough that you knew there would be bruises tomorrow morning. You’d have to find a way to cover them up if you wanted to leave your room.

He chuckled as he heard you moan.

“Do you want me, Schatz?”, he asked quietly. You knew that he knew your answer, but he wanted to tease you, wanted to make you say it

“Yes.” “How badly? Use your words.”

His hand slipped between his legs, grabbing his cock and dragging it through your slit, gathering your wetness on his tip.

“Please… Please, König, I need you. I need you so badly, I-”

You were cut off when he finally thrust forward. You had to bite back a quiet whine as you felt the ache of being filled by him. It always took you a moment to get used to his size.

“So good… So good for me. Look at how well you’re taking me, mein Engel.”

His lips were still on your neck, kissing you, sometimes biting down slightly.

For a moment he just held still until he could feel you relax under him. You gasped as he slowly started to shift, drawing himself out of you and then fucking back inside of you, mumbled words of praise on his lips as he did.

“Fuck… Fuck, you feel so good.”

He slowly picked up the pace, slamming into you until you couldn’t hold back your moans anymore, desperate noises escaping you with every thrust.

He knew the perfect balance between not hurting you, but also being rough enough to make your mind go blank.

“Touch yourself for me, Baby. I want you to come around my cock."

You followed his command without question, of course you did. Your fingers circled your clit, making you see white as you did.

“König-” “What is it, honey?” He pushed himself upwards so you could look him in the eyes, the mask smoothly falling over his face again.

“Feels so good.” “I know, Baby, I know.” His pace was brutal and you could feel yourself getting closer and closer to your release, your breath coming in stutters.

“You’re doing so, so well for me. And I want you to come for me, okay?”

You didn’t know whether it was him getting even slightly rougher with your body, your fingers on your clit or his words, but you cried out as your orgasm came over you, tightening around him.

“Good girl, such a good girl.”

Your hands desperately grasped his arms, seeking something to hold onto as he chased his own orgasm.

“Please-” You didn’t even know what you wanted to say, the overstimulation of still being fucked by him through your orgasm making you almost dizzy.

On one hand you wanted to squirm out of his grasp to escape that ache in your core, on the other you wanted him to continue forever, until you couldn’t form a single coherent thought anymore.

“Scheiße, Baby, I am… So close. I think I’m going to… Oh fuck-” His thrusts became erratic as he came with a growl, coming as deeply inside of you as he could.

You moaned as you could feel him fill you, warmth pooling between your legs.

He groaned as he came down from his orgasm, pulling you close to his chest, holding you against him, your body against his. Your face was buried in the fabric of his mask, desperate to catch your breath.

“So good for me, every single time.”

#König x reader #cod könig x reader #könig fanfiction #cod x reader #ari writes #KT 2023 #cod fanfiction #i'm sorry if there's grammatical errors or anything like that #i have a headache so i can't promise my proofreading was any good

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iwriteasfotini · 29 days ago

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To all the writers: PLEASE...

TW/Rating: This post talks about sex. Not descriptions of sex acts, but how sex is written about in media/fanfiction. Just keep that in mind.

I see some patterns and problems in the standards popular media sets for physical appearance and sexualization (I mean, duh). I'm also well into adulthood, and went through my own Twilight phase a LONG time ago (I'm not proud of it, but there it is).

Fanfiction is interesting because it offers anyone the chance to write, to be read, and you don't have to answer to ANYONE on your content. You also don't make any money. Which is great because it means everyone most people writing are doing it because they are passionate about the project.

Media has set fully unattainable standards for both physical attractiveness and sexualization. When I think that most people reading current fanfiction are between 16-25 (???) it makes me VERY conscious of how I choose to approach these topics in my writing. It took a long time in my own life to embrace myself as I am and that life doesn't happen like a movie. Of course we all claim to know this. But when you crest that hill, whether you are 16, 24, 38, or beyond, you realize that there was always a small part of you who thought it should/could happen a certain way.

People, it doesn't! And it is extremely freeing to realize your partner isn't going to take you on a surprise vacation to Maui (where you both get wicked tan, spend all day lounging and drinking from the swim up bar, and have days of the best sex of your life) BUT they also still love you to the ends of the earth.

Ok, so how does this relate to the Marauders and fanfiction?

First, fanfiction is just that, FICTION. It should be an escape. No one Most people don't want to read about someone's boring day of averageness. This means the content will inherently be unrealistic. I have not problem with this. I love to escape into books and fanfiction. LOVE IT! But there are things we can be conscious of as writers in this modern day and age...

Writers: PLEASE be conscious of the messages which show up repetitively in the fandom. I will never ever tell someone what they are writing is wrong. Or bad. No way. You shouldn't be shamed for what you write. BUT you can think about how you present your imagination to the wider world. And be intentional! Are you following a status quo set by people you don't know simply because...? Or are you truly looking at each character and how you bring them to life in your own unique way. And don't be hard on yourself if you realize there are things about your writing you don't like if you reflect. This is growth and growth is good.

Writers: PLEASE don't get bogged down in describing the physical traits of all your characters in minute detail. And once you mention a trait once, you probably don't need to bring it up again. Let your audience have some space to HC how they want. Especially in fanfiction where beloved characters are written again and again.

Writers: PLEASE write somewhat realistic sex scenes. I'm going to do a whole separate post on this at some point, but it is something very dear to my heart and when your audience is young, I think setting healthy expectations in this arena is so much better than writing scene after scene of earth shattering sex. If you are going to write many multi-orgasm mind blowing sex scenes (full disclosure, I DO THIS), I hope you laid a foundation of how your characters got to where they are. LOTS OF PRACTICE. MOST ORGASMS AREN'T SIMULTANEOUS. PEOPLE LEARN THEIR PARTNER AND THEN CAN MAKES SEX AMAZING FOR THAT SPECIFIC PERSON. And other such ideas.

*As a disclaimer to the above, I LOVE a good smut scene with awesome and less realistic sex. But make sure your reader knows this isn't the status quo. This is that once every now and then insanely good sex some people are lucky enough to experience. I think this comes across best in one-shots, and honestly the more out there the material, the more people are like, yeah, this doesn't happen every day. But great fantasy fuel, as long as you don't set it as your standard for IRL.

Writers: PLEASE let your characters get UGLY. When someone is mortally wounded, they aren't sexy. When someone is having a full on meltdown, bawling their eyes out, wiping their nose on their sleeve over and over again, it's kinda gross, right? But it's also so vulnerable and so realistic. When you are lying on your back crying, your tears run out of the corners of your eyes and into your ears and that sensation sort of tickles and also makes you want to wipe your ears out, and is unique to that position when you cry. Basically think realistically about those moments when your characters are showing their humanity. Capitalize on it to bring those Greek Adonis's down to earth a bit.

Writers: PLEASE make sure all your characters aren't hypersexualized and that each has their own sexuality. This means when writing with many characters POV, romantic encounters look different for all the different pairs(+). Everyone's sexual chemistry is different, even the same character various partners.

Writers: PLEASE throw little humanizing moments particularly in regards to physical appearance or how someone's body can feel into your writing. Like if your characters go on a date, eat a ton of food, then get into bed... having sex while super full isn't fun. That also doesn't mean your characters should never eat! YIKES. Back to the crying (my characters cry a lot). I always make note of where the handkerchiefs are coming from, who is cleaning and drying them (thank you awesome magical world). If you are in the real world, you'd end up with a big old pile of damp tissues, yah know?

Alright, I've said enough. Maybe no one will read this... which is highly likely. But at least I got to vent to my screen and keyboard.

Remember you are beautiful, inside and out.

Wait... one more.

Writers: PLEASE write SOME sex scenes which don't mention how big the guy(s)/or girl (trying to be trans inclusive here, probably a sorry attempt) dicks are. PLEASE. Yup I said it. Not all sex scenes (I get it people, I do), but SOME. Why do we have to mention size at all? Personally I leave the specifics out completely and up to the reader to HC. There might be an implied reference through description of an act. Maybe... probably... but I really do try to keep that minimal.

This concludes my long rant. Gotta go cook dinner for my family (just to remind you we come to the fandom from all shapes, sizes, ages, genders, and beyond). ;-)

#our love is written in the stars #marauders era #marauders fandom #marauders fanon #harry potter fandom #creative writing #writers on tumblr #ao3 author #female writers #writer stuff #aspiring author #harry potter #ao3 #dead gay wizards from the 70s #on writing #writing #writer community

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spnbabe67 · 2 months ago

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With The Taste of Your Lips, I'm On a Ride

Kinktober Day 28: Mile-High Club (S.B.)

Pairing: Soldier Boy x Original Female Character

Warnings: Smut, PiV, Oral (M. Rec), Public sex (they are on a plane, obviously, but the pilot has his headset on)

Summary: Odessa finds a way to curb Ben's boredom and fulfill an item on her bucket list while chasing a lead.

Word Count: 1448

Written for @jacklesversebingo/ Prompt: Write About A First

Authors Note: Title is a lyric from Toxic by Britney Spears. Also, I took some inspo from the songs music vid for this fic!

Odessa had always been jealous of the Supes who could fly. The ability to traverse the skies with ease, completely unburdened by the weight of gravity had always been a source of envy for her. Her own superhuman skillset lacked that particular attribute, much to her chagrin, but she didn’t dwell too much on that fact; it wasn’t like she could do a whole lot about it anyway. Odessa peered longingly out the window of the private jet, watching the white clouds pass by below her; the wispy cirrus clouds occasionally breaking to reveal the cityscape beneath. Ben sighed for what seemed to be the third time in the last ten minutes, the sound of thinly veiled exasperation pulling Odessa’s gaze from out the window to him.

“What?” She asked him, crossing her arms over her chest.

He barely spared her a glance from where he was looking out the window himself. “Nothin.” He grumbled, fingers tapping rhythmically on his knee.

“Mm, no.” Odessa responded. “You’ve been huffing like a freight train over there ever since we took off. What is up with you?”

“‘M bored. There’s nothing to do.”

She rolled her eyes so hard Odessa half expected them to come out of their sockets. She was honestly surprised this hadn’t happened sooner into their 5 hour flight. They’d both burned through the reefer Ben had stashed in his carry on in the first third of the trek, Ben more so than her. They’d been chasing a lead for Butcher, the Brit having convinced both of them to fly out to L.A. since, according to him they “had connections”. Odessa supposed he wasn’t wrong, both she and Ben having people owing them favors from back in their hey-day’s. Hence why they were both completely alone, save for the pilot, on a private jet with a direct flight path from JFK to LAX.

“The unstoppable Soldier Boy, defeated by the simple act of boredom.” Odessa snarked, huffing an amused laugh through her nose.

“Shut your mouth.” Ben retorted, though there was little heat behind his words.

“I thought you liked it open?” Odessa teased, biting her lower lip as Ben leveled a heated look in her direction.

“Why don’t you come over here and put it to good use then.” Ben taunted and Odessa knew he didn’t mean it literally, but the seed had been planted and who was she not to reap its rewards.

It was amusing to see Ben’s eyes flare wide slightly as Odessa uncurled herself from where she’d been sitting across from him, prowling over to him. Even better was the grin spreading across his lips as she lowered herself to her knees in front of him, his legs set wider to accommodate for her to nestle between them.

“God, I love the way you think, Dess.” Ben smirked down at her, running his hand over her head, fingers threading through her hair.

Odessa answered his smirk with one of her own as she slid her hands up his sweatpant-covered thighs, the warmth of his body soaking through the cloth. She wasn’t often cold, but the preternatural heat radiating off of Ben’s body made her want to curl up around him like a cat basking in the afternoon sunlight. Odessa palmed his semi-hard length through his pants, looking up at him through her eyelashes.

“Bucket list item.” She waggled her eyebrows at him. “Always wanted to be a part of the Mile High club.”

“Never really appealed to me.” Ben grunted, tipping his head back against the seat as she moved her hand over his clothed cock with more intent. “Not until now at least.”

His hips chased her touch, brushing forward against her palm, a guttural groan escaping him as Odessa slipped her hand between his pants and his feverish skin, fully grasping him. He gripped the armrests hard enough Odessa could hear the metal start to groan beneath his strength. With his help, Odessa managed to shimmy his sweats down his muscular thighs far enough for his erect length to spring free, slapping against the Giant’s jersey hanging loose on his frame. She was sure she heard the metal beneath his grasp give way as she flattened her tongue against the base of him, licking a long stripe up the underside until she swirled it around his tip. Odessa wrapped her lips around the head of him, red and weeping precum already. The mighty Soldier Boy, reduced to a groaning mess for me.

Odessa gave an amused hum around him when, as she slowly took more and more of him into her mouth, he absolutely made dents in the seat. His hips chased her mouth as Odessa bobbed her head on his cock, hollowing out her cheeks to create a strong suction. Her hand wrapped around the very base of him, nestled amongst the neatly trimmed patch of hair, providing spit-slicked friction to whatever part of him she couldn’t take into her mouth. Even Supes have gag reflexes.

His hand knotted in her hair, guiding her rhythm as his hips started to buck up into her mouth. Her name on his lips along with the lewd sounds of her mouth around him had a wet spot soaking into her panties. Odessa’s other hand slipped down her own pair of sweatpants, providing her clit with much needed friction, Ben’s grip tightening in her hair as he could no doubt smell and hear her touching herself. She gagged slightly around his length as he thrusted harshly up into her mouth, his rhythm becoming more and more erratic as he got closer to his climax. Ben let out a strangled moan as he errantly rolled his hips upwards, cumming down her throat. Odessa did her best to swallow his spend down, her throat working around his length.

Ben used his grip on her hair to pull her up from off her knees, Odessa having barely enough time to pant down enough air to replenish her aching lungs before he crashed his mouth to hers. Her tongue worked against his, letting Ben taste himself on her mouth as she moaned desperately against his lips. Odessa watched him as he grabbed the wrist of the hand that had been stuffed in her pants, pulling her hand to his mouth. Odessa whimpered slightly as his hot mouth wrapped around the fingers she’d just had stuffed in her core, feeling his tongue swirl around them not unlike how her own mouth had treated his cock.

“Fucking delicous.” Ben growled as he pulled off her fingers with a loud pop, licking his lips.

Odessa was sure her panties were completely saturated by this point as she turned around, hooking her thumbs in the waistband of her sweats, pulling them down her legs. Ben’s hands landed on her hips, guiding her down onto his cock. Odessa let her head lean back against his shoulder as Ben shifted her on his lap, propping her feet on his knees. In this position, the air was knocked out of her lungs every time Ben bottomed out in her with how deep he managed to fit inside her. One arm wrapped around to toy with her clit, the other came up to rest around her neck as Ben fucked up into her. Odessa was already halfway there with a hand down her pants while she sucked him off, so that pool of heat in her belly rapidly filled each time Ben’s hips slapped against her own.

Odessa breathed his name, resting her head against the side of his, her hand coming up to card through his hair, his beard rough against the side of her neck. A string of curses fell from her lips as Odessa spasmed around him, her orgasm like a shock of lightning down her spine.

“Shit, so fucking tight, Dess.” Ben cursed, thrusting hard into her has he chased his own orgasm in lieu of her own.

Odessa moaned breathlessly as Ben pounded into her until finally he came deep inside her, hand gripping her thigh harshly. They both panted raggedly as Odessa sat up off his lap, pulling her pants back on. Once they both redressed themselves, Odessa took the seat next to him, laying down with her head in his lap. Both of them passed out soon after, sleeping through the rest of the flight.

“Hope y'all had a good flight.” The pilot said in farewell to them as Odessa and Ben exited the plane.

Odessa made the mistake of glancing over at Ben, seeing the knowing look on his face. Both of them dissolved into a fit of giggles as they departed, much to the pilots confusion,

#jacklesversebingo2024 #soldierboy/ben #soldier boy x oc #soldier boy fanfiction #soldier boy smut #soldier boy #the boys fanfiction #the boys smut #the boys amazon #the boys #kinktober 2024 #kinktober

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spidrzfall · 3 months ago

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Masks, messages, and secrets ⤑ Peter Parker.

finally, i have time to write again. Oh my goodness. enjoy this one, you guys! Sorry if it's not like totally action packed honestly this is a slow burn, and with a ton of small ideas, im working on, so bare with me, please. Im trying, i promise, but this is bound to have some just generic normal people living life scenes, so yeah! Sorry if this is disappointing, though. love you all xoxo - A.

☆° Peter Parker x Male Reader

☆° part two of Tough Night.

☆°• FLUFF - just some banter splice of life stuff babes.

°•▪︎ Fem readers DNI ♡♡

♧ warnings: Language, all characters are 21+ ♧

♡ READ PART ONE : Click me!

♡ Part Three : Coming Soon !

(M/N) didn’t have the gulls to tell Eugene he was secretly texting Peter on the side, after their small dispute the week after, it was almost impossible to even bring up the subject of Peter. It wasn’t hard to see that Eugene was little to not a fan of Peter at all, talking (M/N)’s ear off about how much of a push over he was and he wasn’t someone he wanted his brother to be associated with. Eugene since a young age cared deeply about his brother, from the second his parents brought him from the adoption center a part of him felt the spark of keeping him close, that brotherly instinct to care more about the other and teach him to fend off for himself. Even at a young age Eugene made sure (M/N) knew how to protect himself, not be a pushover to anybody and especially not take shit from anyone.

Home life wasn’t easy on the two, Their father was a drunk who actively threatened their lives and well beings whilst their mother aside from being absent anytime she was in their lives she only instigated the yelling and mental drainess that came along with even living with their father and an absent mother. Eugene always made sure to protect his brother from then, basically taking him into his own care with making them food, getting supplies for their classes in school, driving (M/N) half across Queens to school because the two were enrolled in different schools, making sure his brother didn’t endure everything that happened at home by taking every yelling from their dad. Even with taking bullets for the other he basically trained (M/N) to defend himself, times where he influenced him to not be a pushover…

Everything he claimed Peter was, he never wanted his brother to be.

Was it a surprise to anyone when (M/N) was secretly texting Peter behind Eugene’s back? No. A part of (M/N) was rebellious, whilst he did appreciate Eugene’s protectiveness he couldn’t help but admit sometimes it was overbearing, he knew Eugene had good intentions but there were times he felt he couldn’t even become friends with anyone because of his brother. That of course struck rebelion, the rebellion of (M/N) Thompson. Secretly being a lot more sympathetic, being friends with (what his brother called) losers, not mixing in with the crowd, letting his heart weave the way into life and not his judgment. He allowed himself to be free, something Eugene couldn’t be. Though (M/N) knew why, it was how the guy was born it wasn’t like he had a choice but be a close minded and rough guy. He let his own anger and judgment cloud his decisions and way of expression that was toxic and cruel, which (M/N) would be lying if he said his brother wasn’t changing those old ways now that he was an adult. But that was just still in the works.

Another ding came from (M/N)’s phone, as he slurred in his sleep before another one came through…and another..and another. As he groaned, putting a pillow atop his head trying to tune out the noise, knowing it was probably Eugene texting him something stupid or a string of memes, though it came to the slight realization that (M/N) had Eugene muted on his phone. As he slowly peaked his eye from underneath the pillow as he tiredly grabbed his phone, groaning at the light immiting as his eyes adjusted before checking his notifications Peter’s contact showing through as he looked at the time, what the fuck was this guy doing up at 5 A.M.

(M/N) chuckled as he rolled his eyes before grabbing his phone and rolling over to get comfortable as he opened up his phone and went over to messages, taking note of the 10+ notifications from Eugene’s silenced contact as he ignored them before going to Peters contact, a stiff laugh leaving his lips as he replied.

(M/N) set his phone back down before settling back into bed and drifted into his deep state of sleep. The room, dark some hints of the sunshine occasionally shining through but not enough to separate him from his sleep, his snores echoing in the four walls of his bedroom as the slow quiet hum of the apartment's A.C can be heard. The cold breeze substituting the once warm bedroom.

It wasn’t that late by the time (M/N) woke up, shuffling out of bed and grabbing his towel before tiredly making his way to the bathroom and beginning his day with a fresh cold shower, the cold water that hit his skin slowly dissolving the fatigue from his body and into a state of mind where he was finally ready to start the day. Stepping out the shower and into his towel as he dried himself and put on clothes that were much more comfortable yet presentable as he dried his damp hair, adding some coconut oil just to enhance his hair's health and get rid of any damage. Putting on his shoes before tackling his messenger bag that looked like it was massively decorated by a 5 year old who was handed unlimited access to pins and buttons, stepping out the door and to the more lively part of where he lived. Eventually stumbling across his favorite breakfast joint, SoBal Forest Hills, stepping inside as he ordered his usual which was an Acai Bowl, eating it peacefully before stepping out only for somebody to bump into him, making his breakfast splatter on his shirt, staining it a magenta color with sprinkles of the granola that laid atop of it.

“Watch it! God dammit this was my favorite shirt..” (M/N) mumbled as he tried to take off the remains of the now ruined food. Turning to the guy he had bumped into only for a flash of red and blue to pass by him, Spider-Man. Of course, only the one person who bumped into him the whole day was a criminal being chased down by the well known vigilante, looks like he wasn’t getting an apology anytime soon. Deciding to live with the stain as the salvaged the little of acai left in the bowl as he ate it up before throwing it away and making his way towards the small supermarket nearby as he picked up some food he thought he needed to survive the next couple of weeks before finally going back home, stepping inside, placing the groceries onto the wooden dining table and quickly taking off the stained shirt, dragging himself into his bedroom before placing on a brand new shirt, shuffling out his jeans and into some basketball shorts before going to unpack his groceries.

Nightfall not taking to long to arrive before he heard his phone buzz in the midst of him ordering some food ,feeling too lazy to cook, as he looked at the notification, falling in from Peter who was asking him to call which (M/N) gladly accepted as he looked at his phone that had an incoming call as he accepted, a loud windy sound coming from the speaker as he chuckled. “Dude, where are you? A giant fan?” (M/N) was the first to speak as Peter let out a dry laugh “No, I’m just running. Mother hubbard, I’m exhausted.” Peter panted, his voice partially muffled which (M/N) assumed was the sound quality as the windy sound finally came to an end, most likely from him stopping to take a breath. “So Acai bowl huh?” Peter continued after finally catching his breath, a small pant still leaving his lips.

“How’d you know?” (M/N) leaned against this counter, as he crossed his arm. His phone on the counter and on speaker, Peter's voice echoing from the phone's speakers. “I was doing some outdoor photography for work and I saw you, I was gonna call out but you seemed frustrated so I let you be.” – “Could’ve bought me another Acai bowl, just saying could’ve put me in a much better mood.” (M/N) joked as it managed to get a laugh out of Peter which made the other smile. “SoBal Forest Hills, right? It’s near where we live so I might at some point, when I’m feeling nice.” Peter replied. “Oh when he feels nice, what an honor.”

“yeah yeah, don’t get flustered on me now- shit I gotta go, sorry man. I’ll text you! Bye- Hey!” Peter had a small outburst before the call hung up as (M/N) stood in his kitchen, a confused look on his face before shaking his head and continuing to order his food. Awaiting for it, cuddling up into a blanket on his couch, Forest Gump playing on his television, his attention drawn away as a small knock came from his balcony. As he raised a brow, not sure if he heard it before it happened again as he stood up and cautiously peeked through the curtains. A glimpse of red and blue shining from outside as his eyes made contact with the familiar almost diamond oval shaped lenses as he took a double take. Opening the curtains as it revealed Spider-Man on the other side which caused (M/N) to rub his eyes before opening his balcony.

“Spider-Man?” (M/N)’s voice was laced with uncertainty as he looked at the masked vigilante who waved at him, the other hand behind the hero's back. “You’re the guy the car thief bumped into this morning, right? Acai bowl guy.” Spider-Man finally spoke as he faced (M/N) settling on the edge of the balcony, the question earning him a nod from the man. Spider-Man’s hand came out from hiding to reveal an acai bowl, “Here. As an apology for this morning.” The hero handed him the small bowl as (M/N) hesitated but took it. “Thanks…How’d you know I live here?” There’s a question the hero didn’t expect as he let out a nervous laugh, it’s not like he could tell the other he was Peter so he came up with an obvious lie, “It’s a part of the powers.”

“The powers?” (M/N) crossed his arm over the other as he raised a brow, skeptical. “Yeah. the powers.” Spider-Man repeated, affirming him. “So where does my friend Shane live?” (M/N) asked as he eyed the hero who scrambled for a reply. “Okay it’s not the powers but I have my ways to know these things.” – “So a stalker.” – “No, gross. I’m not some weirdo.” Spider-Man scoffed as he waved his hand as a dismissal. “You’re a guy in red and blue spandex who can thwip out webs from the wrist and climb walls, I don’t think you get a pass from not being called a weirdo.” (M/N) replied. “I take it back, i want the bowl back.” Spider-Man joked as he extended out a hand to take the bowl back. “Hey! No. this was an apology gift” (M/N) replied, laughing. “Well i take back my apology.” Spider-Man protested, enjoying the familiar banter.

“You are so much more rude than what people let on.” (M/N) spoke before temporarily going inside to put away the acai bowl. Going back outside where he had left the vigilante. “Only when I need to.” The other replied. “Your voice sounds familiar…has anyone ever told you that?” (M/N) asked as he leaned against the railing of the balcony “Only a few dozen people, I have a handsome recognizable voice, probably a celebrity.”

“Yeah? You’re probably some celebrity named Andrew Garfield or something weird like that…”

“Andrew?Jees no. ”

“Is your name Andrew”

“You’re off by a landslide.”

The two laughed, before staring at each other. Quickly interrupted by a knock coming from inside as (M/N) stepped in for a while hearing it again, “that’s my dinner…say do you wanna split..it…” (M/N) paused as he turned around only to see nobody looking back at him, the hero long gone as he frowned before closing the balconies glass door and curtains and getting his food, thanking the delivery person, in the midst of it all finding himself wishing the hero stayed longer. A text interrupting his thoughts, It was Peter, telling him he was home from his run as (M/N) texted back a ‘glad your home safe’ only for a request of a call to come in which he accepted. Eugene on the other line, “You’ll never guess who came by tonight” (M/N) began interrupting Eugene’s hello. “Who?” Alex adjusted himself on the floor, chewing his food quickly and swallowed it before replying back to Eugene.

“Spider-Man!”

“Bullshit.” Eugene laughed. “He brought me an acai bowl.” (M/N) replied before adding another piece of food into his mouth a satisfied hum leaving his mouth as he savored it. “Why?” Eugene asked as he can be heard shuffling, blankets rustling given he was most likely on his bed. “Some guy ran into me this morning throwing my breakfast onto my shirt and he felt sorry so he brought me some.” Eugene only hummed in reply “How’d he know where you live?”

“His powers.”

“His powers?”

“Yep. His powers.”

credit :: enchanthings - dividers !!

@darknessbringer the ideas !!

#andrew garfield x male reader #tasm peter parker #tasm peter parker x male reader #andrew garfield #male reader #andrew garfield peter parker #andrew garfield peter parker x male reader #peter parker x male reader #the amazing spider man

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solosikoasgf · 2 years ago

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random (nsfw) things about solo ,

decided to make this a little mini series by diving into my favorite person next, solo sikoa-again for character development!!!!.

with his imposing stature and strict face, it's pretty typical to thing solo is the domineering one when it comes to getting down and dirty - but it's surprising how willing he is to change roles, loving to control and also be controlled. as many say he's a wildcard in the ring - this applies to out of it as well. solo listens, he watches, he takes note. there's not a single thing his lover does that he hasn't noticed, not a single comment that hasn't been filed away in his mind.

i think foreplay for solo really looks like a different form of aftercare, with a focus on both himself and his lover. disconnecting from the world outside is a big focus for him, and he likes to come home and have his person be his entire world. no distractions.

warm all encompassing back hugs with strong arms wrapped around you, his face pressed to your neck.

massages with the actual intent to have a massage but starting with showering together first - moments where he can decompress. he loves when you insist on washing his back, or how you smile when he complains the water is too hot.

lights are always off when you shower together - a candle lighting the way instead to help set mood but also set a calm atmosphere.

quiet mumbles on your days went while helping each other get clean without getting too distracted by kissing each other.

solo always insists on massages once you're both mostly dry but your skin is damp. there's something very intense and gentle about the way he handles your body underneath his hands, rough, pushing and pulling against your shoulders first, then your shoulder blades and slipping down to your lower back. quiet talks resume about nothing in particular, and it's not necessarily you or him talking back to each other.

things always change once he hits your legs, always innocently focused until he gets to your thighs where his mind wanders. where touches become rougher and rubs become more possessive grabs, and he can't help but place soft kisses all across your skin, starting from your thighs all the way up your back, with his hand slipping in between your thighs while he works his way up to mutter in your ear to ask if this is what you want.

consent is always a must for him, whether it's outright or teasing.

the solo you get is dependent on you both.

if he's in control, it's rough but with a degree of softness. firm squeezes on your thighs, tits, damn near body worship. he aims for your pleasure and your only, and he takes his time to get you there, not even thinking on his own needs.

"tell me when it's too much....i won't stop, but still tell me."

"does it feel good when i touch you there?"

"don't be quiet for me baby, i want to know how good i make you feel."

"tell me where you want my tongue to go."

"i want you to leave a mess all over me."

big time into face-sitting. strong arms wrapped around your thighs to hold you in place while he eats like a man starved - not even stopping when you've reached your own high. he wants to take you there again and again and again - on his face, on his tongue, on his fingers, on his dick.

he actually enjoys when you take control from him at times. when roles are reversed and you worship his body in the same way he's obsessed with yours. just watching your body move on top of his sets something off inside of him.

def a grunter, low moaner. arm thrown over his face, teeth grit, one hand searching to touch you always.

a lot of quiet swearing.

cowgirl is his favorite position - he gets off on the visuals of you on top, your hands on his chest, and his own hands trying to pull you on top of him to feel every part of you. he takes a lot of that time to revel in his own pleasure, to have attention on him, but also to take you in.

#solo sikoa imagine #solo sikoa fic #solo sikoa fanfiction #solo sikoa x reader #wwe fanfiction #roman reigns fanfiction #**ssgf #happy sunday hussies!!! have some mild debauchery

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a-small-batch-of-dragons · 1 year ago

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Come Now, Little Duke | The Good Stuff

Okay, so if you can't tell I've been going through some of your stories again and catching up on updates and asdfjlk you're such an amazing writer! The personality you give the characters is so good it makes me want to scream and your prose? *chef's kiss* Is it alright if I hit you with another prompt? You've written a lot of Janus comforting Roman (which I love), but I just got caught up in Come Now, Little Prince (I think it just might be my favourite of your stories) and Janus comforting Remus filled my heart in ways I can't describe. Could we get more of our favourite danger noodle comforting, protecting, and being possessive of the trash rat? – twoalpacas

Read on Ao3

Warnings: gunshot, blood loss, passing out from injury, mentions of being on heavy painkillers/drugs

Pairings: dukeceit

Word Count: 1420 (it's what he would've wanted.)

Remus had never seen Janus fight before. That's why he's there—to get hurt for him, to do the dirty work, to pull the necessary levers and little administrative violences. But Janus was a breathtaking fighter. If Remus hadn't already been clocked rather hard on the head, dazed and on the ground, ready to pass out, he might have swooned at the sight.

The attackers dropped.

Janus was at his side in an instant, expression intent.

"You don't like getting your hands dirty," he slurred.

"I don't like losing my best operative either. Don't worry, I'll get you to clean the blood off my hands on your knees when you're not dying," Janus said, still a little too concerned to be his normal unflappable self, "restore the order of the universe."

Remus snorted and regretted it. Wounded was not good for laughing.

"Come on, then," Janus said, grunting as he slid an arm under Remus's back, "these new clothes are coming out of your budget if you can't get them clean."

An order was an order. He gritted his teeth and hauled himself up, an injured hand pressing against the gunshot wound. An involuntary hiss through his teeth as pain ravaged his limbs followed by a moment of surprise as Janus's body pressed warm and solid against his side.

"Stay awake until we get to the car," he muttered as they slowly made their way through the carnage, "then you can pass out."

Get to the car. Get to the car. Get to the car.

He was still conscious by the time they finally made it to the car, but Janus was practically dragging him to the door. Air passed weakly through his lips as he fumbled woozily for the door handle.

Janus's voice mumbled something but it sounded like it was coming through syrup. Pain fluttered like static across his field of vision and his head slipped down.

He opened his eyes.

A ceiling stared back at him. He blinked. Outside didn't have ceilings. He must be inside. But cars didn't have ceilings that looked like this. So they must be inside inside somewhere. Did he make it to the car? He hoped he made it to the car. Janus said to make it to the car.

"Good. You're awake."

Remus turned his head to see Janus pulling a chair up to the bed. He…how long had he been like this?

"You've been out for about an hour," Janus said, "welcome back."

Remus swallowed. His mouth felt like it was full of cotton. "Why…why'm I so…sthlow?"

"A combination of your injuries and the sedatives, plus the gauze in your mouth." Gloved hands reached up to pry it out, leaving his mouth slightly less cottony, but only slightly. He blinked slowly. Janus tutted and reached back up, brushing a bit of hair from his face and whistling lowly. "They got you good, huh? I've never seen so much blood all over your pretty face."

If Remus hadn't lost so much blood, he probably would've blushed.

"Wha—" he tried to swallow some of the cotton— "wha'd Doc say?"

"Let's just stick to the good news for now," Janus said darkly, "which is that you're not dying anymore."

Oh. That was good news. As Janus stood and turned away, he remembered something. He gritted his teeth and started to get up.

"And what," Janus said sharply, "do you think you're doing?"

Remus gestured weakly. "Your hands."

"And what about my hands?"

"'M supposed to clean them."

Confusion furrowed Janus's brow until he realized what Remus was talking about and he rolled his eyes. "Get back in the bed," he said, exasperated, "you're not out of the woods just yet."

Oh. A bed. Is that was he was laying on> But his bed didn't look like that. Or feel like that. His ceiling didn't look like that either. But orders were orders.

Janus had disappeared by the time he lay back down. He blinked, still slightly woozy. Blood loss, probably. Or the pain. But he couldn't feel much pain right now. That was bad, right? When you couldn't feel that it hurt?

"Don't shift around too much," Janus said lowly, sitting next to him again, "just because we've got you on the good stuff doesn't mean you won't do any more damage."

He stilled, lying there motionless, until Janus sighed and shifted.

"I've never seen you this quiet before," he said, "outside of a stakeout or when you're asleep."

Remus didn't say anything.

"Here." Janus turned his head gently so it lay facing him. "There's still blood on you."

Remus just blinked as Janus started to dab at his forehead with a tissue. His brow was drawn in concentration, his gaze on his work. He caught Remus looking and raised an eyebrow.

"Yes?"

Remus blinked. Several expressions flickered across Janus's face and he dropped the tissue.

"What is it?" he barked. "Tell me what hurts, right now. Did they wear off already?"

"'M sorry."

"Don't apologize, just tell me what hurts. Did you pull your stitches out?"

"'M sorry, Boss."

Janus paused, gaze darting all over Remus's face, before he reached out and cupped his cheeks in his hands. "Tell me what you're sorry for," he instructed softly, "and then tell me why you're crying."

Crying? Remus was crying? Oh. That was bad. This was wrong. Janus wasn't kind to him. Janus wasn't gentle with him. He was only kind and gentle when he was lying or when he wanted something. Maybe that was why he was being kind and gentle right now, because Remus did so bad.

"I did bad," he mumbled, voice catching and hiccupping a few times, "I—I did bad."

"What did you do," Janus asked, hands still warm on his face, "what was bad?"

"Y' said 'good stuff,'" Remus managed, "good stuff's only for…for when it's bad and—and if it's bad then I did bad. I did bad."

Janus's eyes widened. That was bad too, right? Yes. If he did bad then that meant it wasn't good and if it wasn't good then Janus would be mad and if Janus was mad then that was bad.

"Oh, you poor thing," he heard distantly before the warm hands were on his torso, "come on, now, up you sit. Sit up, just like that, that's it."

He couldn't breathe properly. Why couldn't he breathe properly? Breathing hurt. Breathing wasn't supposed to hurt. If he did so bad that breathing hurt then Janus would be really mad.

"Easy, now." Something warm settled on his abdomen. "Slow in down. Nice and easy, come on, relax."

But Janus was mad—

"I'm not mad, sweetie," the gentle voice said, "calm down, now."

The gentle voice began to lull him, breathing becoming less and less like dragging himself over razor wire and more like just inhaling and exhaling. The warmth settled on his face again.

"I expect my agents to fear me," he heard distantly, "but not like this. I don't like seeing you like this. If you're ever like this again, you come and you find me, do you understand? I'll make it better."

Remus blinked.

"…you can't understand a word I'm saying, can you?" The warmth passed over his face. "You poor thing. Oh, you poor, sweet thing…"

Remus let out a whimper as he was moved.

"Shh, shh, it's alright now. No more thinking for you right now. You go to sleep while the drugs wear off, okay?"

S-sleep? He could sleep?

"Yes, you can sleep. It's okay, just fall asleep whenever you need to. I have you." Something soft and slightly damp pressed against his forehead. "I'll look after you for now."

The last thing he thought he felt was something warm and wet cleaning the blood from his hands.

General Taglist: @frxgprince@potereregina@gattonero17@iamhereforthegayshit@thefingergunsgirl@awkwardandanxiousfander@creative-lampd-liberties@djpurple3@winterswrandomness@sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes@iminyourfandom@bullet-tothefeels@full-of-roman-angst-trash @ask-elsalvador @ramdomthingsfrommymind@demoniccheese83@pattonsandershugs @el-does-photography @princeanxious@firefinch-ember@fandomssaremysoul@im-an-anxious-wreck@crazy-multifandomfangirl @punk-academian-witch@enby-ralsei@unicornssunflowersandstuff@wildhorsewolf @thetruthaboutthesun @stubbornness-and-spite @princedarkandstormv @your-local-fookin-deadmeme @angels-and-dreams@averykedavra @a-ghostlight-for-roman @treasurechestininterweb @cricketanne @queerly-fluid-fan @compactdiscdraws@cecil-but-gayer@i-am-overly-complicated@annytheseal@alias290@tranquil-space-ninja @arxticandy @mychemically-imbalanced-romance@whyiask@crows-ace @emilythezeldafan@frida0043 @ieatspinalcords @snowyfires@cyanide-violence@oonagh2@xxpanic-at-the-everywherexx@rabbitsartcorner @percy-07734@triflingassailantofmyemotions @virgil-sanders-the-gay-emo@cerulean-watermelon@puffed-up-bees@meltheromanstan@joyrose-fandomer@insanitori@mavenmush@justablah65@10paradox10@uhhh-hi-there-i-am-nervous@cutebisexualmess@bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti@ultrageekygirl

#dragonbabbles #sanders sides #remus sanders #sympathetic remus #janus sanders #deceit sanders #sympathetic deceit #fic

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heliomanteia · 2 months ago

Note

Hi! I've stumbled across a couple of your posts about Calypso and I just wanted to say that it was nice to see someone that thinks about her the same way that I do. She is deeply flawed and does things that are wrong, but she's also a whole person being used as a punishment by the gods for some random man they don't like very much. It's just so wonderful for me to see a person that can see her whole character instead of just her poor meow meow Odysseus potential

(like the rape headcanon which has a single (ONE SINGLE LINE) of evidence in the entire saga for. I'm so sick of people taking this character that probably doesn't even know what sex is and deciding that she's a rapist because she was in the original Odyssey. Literally no one else gets this treatment but her)

Hello, Epic!Calypso means a lot to me and every time I see an incessantly mean post about her I grow to like her more in defiance /lh

I feel a lot of ways about Calypso and I'm very biased because I resonate with her on some deep personal level. But also your ask allows me to rant and so I will:

🌊 I like Calypso as a character because she's complex. She has close to no known lore in the Odyssey and I choose to ignore other texts that mention her because, well, Epic is loosely based off the Odyssey. The musical expanded on the little personality she had in the text in a good way, in my opinion. She's more than a foil/functional narrative part she was in the original text.

🌴 I feel like you're making a good point by saying she probably doesn't know what sex is. While she's clearly an adult woman, she was supposedly imprisoned young (if you follow the general myth, then during Titanomachy) and it's never stated she had prior lovers. She probably has an idea of intimacy but no experience of intimacy. She's also not socialized properly. I would compare her experience to someone living in total isolation or solitary confinement. Of course her people skills are limited. She needs therapy, not public scrutiny.

🥥 Whether or not you believe immortal beings age and mature depends on the source but mythology (generally) offers us examples of growing up and becoming of Gods so I believe Calypso grew up on that island. Her saying she was imprisoned "when young" also kinda hints it imo. With that said, this girl might have as well spent her formative years alone. Loneliness has devastating effects on psyche, I'm surprised she's not deathly depressed. That is, if we choose a sympathetic route — which is what I choose to follow because Epic is overall written as a sympathetic narrative. If it wasn't, I'd just call Odysseus a war criminal that deserves all he got.

🐚 This one is controversial but I cannot help but feel sympathy for the way Calypso imagines a happily-ever-after and genuinely believes in that illusion. It reminds me a lot of how someone with a stigmatized mental disorder would view reality in a distorted way — and sometimes even hurt other people without meaning to hurt them. Toxic (this word is so overused), suffocating love? And from both of her songs we know she didn't mean to hurt Odysseus. Her actions were wrong, her reasonings convoluted, but she did not mean harm. She hurt him without an intention to hurt him and she can't see that she hurt him because her world rotates on completely different system of axis. You could say she understands she might have been wrong but she won't apologize for it.

🍹 I will never keep repeating that she's an immortal character that lacks human morality overall + she's never been around others before Odysseus. The way she's scrutinized for the same things other Gods across mythology do (most of whom are constantly around mortals and have a track of seducing them) is such a knee-jerk response it's funny.

Like I said before, I personally choose to interpret Calypso's "ambush" as at least somewhat physical, but at the end of the day it is an assumption/personal preference. You reminded me, though, how, hm, peculiar it is that she's so far the only character whose mythical counterpart overpowers her musical persona in the fandom about the musical. I appreciate that people are aware of the text of the Odyssey enough (I hope) but there has to be a limit to the complaining. Jorge works hard to create fleshed out characters for his own loosely inspired story that he fills in with his own narratives. I think it gets to the point of ridiculous when a fleshed out character is ignored in favor of a barely defined myth counterpart.

Her character didn't get absolved of the blame, she got two banger songs that completely align with her myth persona, literally what is that thing that makes people so mad about her. Because if it's personal distaste then it sure overpowered the ability to enjoy complicated narratives and characters that do not align with what the main character needs.

#❔#I cannot believe I have to explain a complex character to a fandom about a musical about a complicated man smh 😔#epic the musical #epic calypso

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magefeathers · 5 months ago

Text

Sleep Token Analysis: ONE

To my continuing surprise people seem to like my Sleep Token thoughts, so I guess I should start posting my song interpretations.

I wrote about my interpretation of Sleep itself here, and while I'd love for you to read that as well, it isn't required reading for my song interpretations. The only really important thing to know is that I don't interpret the music as being about Sleep, regardless of what you personally view Sleep as.

I have a very grounded/realistic/logical way of interpreting things, because that's just the way my brain works, but I want to make it clear that I'm not trying to analyze or decipher anything about Vessel's actual human life in the real world. I think there's a narrative being told, that is shared primarily through emotional responses to events rather than events themselves being portrayed, and the narrative composed by any interpretation of these emotional responses may or may not be an actual reflection of any real events that may have inspired them. I have no clue, and I have no desire to find out. So, for the sake of remaining within the narrative, I will refer to the person singing as the narrator, and the person being sung about as the subject. If I use the name Vessel, I'm referring to him as a third person writer – best way I can explain how I think about it is, the narrator is Lemony Snicket, while Vessel is Daniel Handler (the real author). No part of this is meant to be dissecting his actual life, only the characters in the narrative.

Disclaimer aside, onto the analysis!

THREAD THE NEEDLE

Bury me inside this Labyrinth bed We can feel that time is Dilated

There are a number of instances across the discography where the context in which something is presented and the tone in which it's sung doesn't quite match the implication of the actual words. It's harder to pick up on than more blatant lyrical dissonance (as in the original version of Hey Ya) because a lot of the lyrics are so cryptic to begin with, so you have to really think about what he's saying to pick up on the dissonance.

Saying you want to be buried somewhere seems like a positive thing (I want to spend eternity here), but labyrinths tend to symbolize confusion and struggling to find your way, searching for the right path. So in saying ‘bury me inside this labyrinth bed’ he's asking… to spend forever in a place that causes confusion and uncertainty?

Likewise, to say that time is dilated in this seemingly complimentary context is an interesting choice, because when something is dilated that means it's been expanded, and normally it's a negative thing when we say that time feels like it's just stretching on and on. But if the narrator wants to spend eternity here, it must be meant to be a good thing, especially if the narrator and the subject are spending the night in fascination.

One possibility is that he was thinking about it in a less literal sense and more in the sense of your pupils dilating when you look at someone you love, but I tend to lean more toward believing this dissonance is intentional. Perhaps it's because time feels dilated in this place that he's resigned to spending eternity here: he already feels trapped, so why not simply choose to stay? Regardless of the reasons why the narrator might want this, the dissonance tells us that what the narrator is idealizing isn’t actually healthy, or as good as he thinks it is.

It might seem like a bit of a jump for the first set of lyrics, but when taken in the context of the rest of the discography, I feel like this is about the tendency to wallow in one's own misery, to make your depression and trauma a fundamental part of who you are and revel in them, rather than trying to heal. Change is hard; the confusion and uncertainty and the pain they bring are all familiar and comfortable, and that's why the narrator wants to stay with them.

We can spend the night in Fascination You can thread the needle Time and time again

I had only ever heard the phrase ‘threading the needle’ in a mostly literal context, referring to anything to the effect of navigating through a narrow opening. So I googled the phrase to make sure I understood it fully, and apparently it can also mean, “to find harmony or strike a balance between conflicting forces, interests, etc.”

So with the phrasing of this – we can spend the night in fascination, you can thread the needle – it makes me wonder, if the subject is the one finding this harmony, what are the conflicting forces at play here? Again taking the rest of the discography into context my most realistic assumption is that the subject is bringing peace to the conflict the narrator feels within himself, between his mind and his mental illness. As I personally read a lot of signs of pre-existing familial trauma in later music, it could also be that the subject feels like a safe haven from the conflict of the narrator's home life.

You turn the lights down Come on and find out

An invitation extended to the subject; he's already said I want to spend forever here, now he's saying I want you to join me. Come and spend the night in fascination with me. I want you in this labyrinth with me because you bring me peace. If I'm going to be lost forever, I want to be lost with you.

Now. It's perhaps worth mentioning that the narrator inviting the subject to turn the lights down and join him in a labyrinth bed to spend the night in fascination can certainly be read in a suggestive manner, and I want to clarify that although I see the innuendo there, and I do think it's an intentional innuendo, I don't actually think any of this is about sex. I think Vessel as a writer sometimes uses very sensual or suggestive phrasing to convey a level of intimacy that many people instinctively associate with sex, even though he isn't talking about sex. There's this ongoing theme across the discography of the narrator wanting to know the subject inside and out, including the parts of themself that they hide from the rest of the world, and I think there's an intimacy to that level of allowing someone into your inner world that goes deeper than just sex. I think he's just using the trappings of sexiness to set this stage of intimacy, because, y’know, sex sells and whatnot.

Something to confide in Something to erase Just look at where we're lying An invisible space

Not someone to confide in, but something, steering away from the more common usage of the word. I feel like the narrator is still trying to convince the subject to join him in this invisible space, this metaphorical labyrinth – which is probably the fields of elation from the next song. There's a lot of similarities between Thread the Needle and Fields of Elation that lead me to believe that they're sort of different versions of the same song, or different songs telling the same story, however you want to think about it. So I think these lines are telling the subject what this dreamscape has to offer: it's something they can believe in and have faith in, something that can erase the woes of the real world.

We can spend the night in Fascination You could thread the needle Time and time again

Also worth mentioning is that in the original myth of the labyrinth, the only way the hero of the story, Theseus, could find his way out of the labyrinth was by using a ball of thread given to him by the Princess Ariadne, who had fallen in love with him. So between you can thread the needle and nobody else can pull me out hopefully you can see why I think this figurative ‘labyrinth bed’ and the ‘fields of elation’ are one and the same. The fields of elation, most commonly interpreted as some sort of dreamscape and the domain of the deity Sleep (although you’ll know how I feel about that if you read my interpretation of Sleep), are the narrator’s personal labyrinth, one he wants to get lost in and is inviting the subject to wander endlessly with him, but… does the subject want to?

It's at this point that the music gets louder and arguably quite tense. I'll be the first to admit I know nothing about actual music theory, but I am generally able to recognize when the sounds being used are meant to make the listener feel anxious or tense, and that's the impression I get from the music here. This is just an assumption, of course, but given how prevalent this dichotomy is on One – between dreamy, ethereal lyrics with sparse and gentle music behind them and then wordless sections with heavy, intense, music – I feel like it's an intentional choice, perhaps to show the contrast between the peace the narrator feels with the subject and the anxiety/depression/abuse/etc that permeates the rest of his life. Or, perhaps, this tension is indicative of the confusion and uncertainty found within the labyrinthian fields of elation, and the whole reason the narrator wants the subject to join him there is to quiet or calm this storm.

If I’m following my interpretation from earlier of the narrator’s wish to stay in this dreamscape being a metaphor for choosing to wallow in one’s depression, perhaps these invitations to the subject are a request to be met where he is rather than forced outside of his comfort zone? It could also relate back to the recurring theme I mentioned earlier, of the narrator wanting to know the subject inside and out, even the parts of theirself they hide from the rest of the world. Maybe these invitations for the subject to join him in this dreamscape – arguably his inner world, whether you look at it as a literal dream world or a metaphor for his depression – are a way of offering to let them in, and share the parts of himself that he hides from the world. Regardless, it’s a request which I don’t think goes over well, judging by how the song ends.

You turn the lights down Come on and find out You turn the lights down Come on and find out

The repetition of this line, these invitations to the subject, leads me to believe the subject has not taken this invitation. The narrator wants to share his inner world, his dreams, his life, with the subject, but his repeated invitations seem to fall on deaf ears. The way the tense music cuts out very suddenly into this repeated line, and then goes straight back into the heavier music with steadily growing tension makes me believe the narrator's first invitation was likely ignored. After some time away from the subject, dealing with whatever conflict exists in his life outside the subject (the tension in the music), he eventually decides he can't take it on his own anymore and comes back to offer his invitation again, only to be either ignored or rejected once more. The way the music simply fades out at the end of the song rather than coming to a concrete end makes me lean more toward the invitation being ignored – there is no closure, no solid answer.

Nothing about this song leads me to believe that the narrator and the subject are actually in a committed relationship. I have mixed feelings about the common belief that the whole of the discography is about one singular toxic relationship, but I tend not to get into it because it doesn’t really matter much in the grand scheme of things. Whether the subject is one toxic partner (or romantic interest) that the narrator keeps going back to or there are multiple subjects signifying multiple toxic relationships over the years, the narrative remains the same: the narrator is stuck in a cycle of abuse. As mentioned before, I’m not trying to analyze Vessel’s actual life in any way, so I generally think it’s worth assuming one subject for the sake of The Narrative. However, it is difficult for me to align my interpretation of One with the rest of the discography because it reads so distinctly like a relationship that never was, to me. I feel like the relationship explored within One is either entirely self-contained within the EP, or takes place very, very early in the relationship with the subject of the album trilogy.

FIELDS OF ELATION

The daylight recedes in unison, this room Buries the hours like death, in motion Nobody else can pull me out The fields of elation, quiet and loamy

The opening of this song is very reminiscent of the opening of the previous song. The daylight receding is obviously a reference to nightfall, and burying the hours I assume is either referring to killing time, or referring to sleeping as being like a temporary death. Either way, I think it's safe to assume the first two lines are referring to passing the nighttime hours in one's room, probably sleeping/dreaming. It recalls bury me inside this labyrinth bed from the previous song, as well as the feeling of time being dilated. This is why I believe the two songs are connected, and these fields of elation are the same invisible place spoken about previously. Whereas the previous song had the narrator inviting the subject to join him in this dreamscape, however, this song says nobody else can pull me out. The subject hasn’t accepted his invitations, and the narrator has decided that the subject is worth partaking in the waking world for.

Your name is a sin I breathe, like oxygen Caught in the careless arms of lust, again Nobody else can pull me out The fields of elation, quiet and loamy

This reinforces my theory that the narrator and the subject aren't actually in a relationship, because the subject's name wouldn't be a sin if it were something he were allowed to indulge in. Whether he uses lust here in the more widely understood manner, or simply as a tool to further compare his feelings for the subject to something sinful and illicit is up to interpretation, but ultimately the message is the same: the narrator's desire for the subject is an indulgence he feels guilty about, but also feels like he needs – like oxygen – and it's a sentiment that's echoed in the refrain at the end of the song.

The heavier music kicks in here, but it doesn’t hold the same tension that ‘Thread the Needle’ did, not at this point, anyway.

And nobody else can pull me out The fields of elation, quiet and loamy And nobody else can pull me out The fields of elation, quiet and loamy

If ‘Thread the Needle’ was the narrator inviting the subject into his inner world, into his dreams, into his life, and receiving no response, then ‘Fields of Elation’ is perhaps a bit of coaxing. I read this as trying to express to the subject how much they mean to him, how important they are to him. If they won't accept the invitation into his dreams, then he insists that they're the only thing better than dreaming, the only thing worth being awake for.

It’s after this section that the tension rises, and then the heavier music cuts out for the final refrain.

I'm losing my faith in our lives apart I'm losing my faith in our lives apart I'm losing my faith in our lives apart I'm losing my faith in our lives apart

This refrain breaks my heart, not only because of the words but because of how hopelessly it's delivered. It sounds like resignation, like he already knows he's going to need to continue on without the subject, even though he doesn't know how he'll be able to. And unlike the fade-out at the end of ‘Thread the Needle’ this song ends rather quickly after this, with only the gentle atmospheric music lingering for a few seconds longer, leaving us on that note of hopelessness.

WHEN THE BOUGH BREAKS

You could stay alive Just tell me that you notice Even in the dark The way I left you breathing

I’m going to hope that staying alive is just a metaphor for staying awake, as I hypothesized the opening of the previous song might be referencing sleeping as being a sort of temporary death. I’m assuming the narrator, by this point, has gotten a flat-out rejection of his invitations, and is now relenting that the subject can stay in the waking world. All he asks is some sort of recognition of what they shared; I’m assuming 'the way I left you breathing' is meant to say he, at some point, took the subject’s breath away?

Sometimes when we touch Everything we love resets It's only just enough Even when we run with death

It seems to me as though this part of the song is acknowledging some flaws in whatever their relationship is. Whether the touching referenced is literal or metaphorical, it seems that this connection is refreshing their love for each other, making it just enough for them to cope with their struggles. This is, honestly, the first time we’ve gotten any hint that the subject might feel the same about the narrator… which is why I’m going to give into the suggestive innuendo for just a moment and say that maybe the previous verse’s 'tell me that you notice [...] the way I left you breathing' is in fact a reference to them sleeping together and the narrator leaving the subject literally, physically out of breath. Perhaps the 'sometimes when we touch / everything we love resets' is meant to say that it’s only the physical aspect of this relationship that’s actually fueling their feelings for each other – or, at least, the subject’s feelings for the narrator. This kind of changes the context of the first part of the song and makes it seem like the narrator is asking the subject to at least admit he made them feel good, even if they don’t want to be in a relationship with him.

We could be released Flowing over sorrow days We could stay suspended Even when the bough breaks

This is what I believe is the core dilemma of this song. It reads to me like two opposing options, a decision that needs to be made: do we fall through, or do we stay suspended? I believe the ultimate meaning of ‘when the bough breaks’ is the moment in a relationship where you realize that it isn’t going to work out. You’re then faced with a decision: do you end the relationship (or give up on pursuing the other person), allowing yourselves to be released and feel the sorrow, or do you choose to stay suspended despite the broken bough, and stay in the relationship (or continue pursuing the other person) when you know they don’t feel the same about you?

If we're going to assume, as most people do, that the entire discography is all about a singular relationship… It unfortunately seems that the narrator chose the latter.

Sometimes when we touch Everything we love resets It's only just enough Even when we run with death

I'm a really big fan of when lyrics change slightly over the course of a song to portray narrative development, character growth, etc. After a second repetition of this verse we get a whole lot of repetitions of the line 'Don’t lie to me,' followed by a slightly altered version of the same verse:

Everything we touch Turns water into blood You try to look away from Even when the bough breaks

Something has changed about the act of the narrator and the subject touching. In the original verse, it seems like the relationship might already be on the rocks, but sometimes their connection is enough – even if only just – to reset things, and remind them why they're together. In the altered verse, they're spilling blood and trying to ignore it – or at least the subject is trying to ignore it: you try to look away from, the narrator says. The repetitions of the phrase Don’t lie to me leads me to believe the subject has maybe been exaggerating their feelings for the narrator in order to keep him around. Maybe their denial of the narrator’s invitations to join in his dreamscape was what made it clear to the narrator that these feelings weren’t genuine, and now he’s asking for an honest answer. Tell me that you notice [...] the way I left you breathing. Whether the physical relationship was all the subject was interested in or not, that seems to be the conclusion the narrator has drawn.

You don't really love, you just hate to be alone You hate to be alone You hate to be alone

The previous verse and this one are repeated for the rest of the song, with the repetitions of 'don’t lie to me' overlaid with them. The repetition reads as insistence to me, as if the narrator is arguing his perspective and trying to get the subject to admit to it. The heavier section of music kicks in at the start of the third repetition, but similar to the middle of ‘Fields of Elation’ it doesn’t immediately give the sense of tension that I feel in other places, it’s just gotten busier and louder. After the lyrics fade out, however, it does get noticeably more tense, and this tension persists almost for the entire final minute and half of the song, with only brief moments where it eases up.

The song ends by cutting out very suddenly, in one of the more tense sections. I'd like to interpret this as the final argument and an end to the relationship, as it was clearly unreciprocated and unbalanced. If we are to interpret the full discography as being about a singular relationship, however, maybe this is only the first of a sequence of break-ups and make-ups. If I'm right about the repetition of the accusatory final verses being indicative of the narrator arguing his point and trying to get the subject to admit to their lack of feelings for him, it's possible that he just pushed the subject away with his strong, internalized belief that nobody could or would truly love him.

We'll never know, and that is both the beauty and the tragedy of it.

If you read this far, I thank you for hearing out my thoughts 💖 The plan was for me to tackle Two next, but after the success of this post and my later realization of the connection between the songs on TMBTE and their inverted counterparts on Sundowning, I think that's the next essay I'm going to write, because I'm very excited about all the parallels I've found. After that I'll get back to Two, and then the stand-alone singles, and then I'll have to figure out how I want to go about the albums.

Feel free to add in the replies/tags if you think I should do the albums all together in one post (like this) or if I should break them up in chunks of a few songs at a time. I'd like to keep the full albums together but I don't want to make people sit through mile-long posts, so I might opt to just not analyze every single lyric and rather focus on the lyrics I have specific thoughts on. But I also might end up having thoughts on every lyric, so, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#sleep token #sleep token theory #sleep token interpretation #enjoy approximately 4k words of me babbling :)#i got too many 'wheres the essay op?' comments on that post about the summoning and drag me under and now I'm feeling brave

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hughiecampbelle · 2 years ago

Text

Dating Connor Roy Would Include:

Requested: Lovedddd the preferences with the succession characters, got me really inspired to possibly request a general dating headcanons for Connor Roy possibly? - anon

A/N: Y'all, idc what anyone says, Connor deserves love just as much as the rest of them. I hope this headcanon does his character justice, my love!!! Ty for requesting!!! Feedback is appreciated!!! 💜💜💜

Connor truly just wants to be loved. He wants to be loved in a way that makes up for all the time he wasn't, for all the time he felt unlovable, all the time he was forgotten over and over again

You and Connor meet at one of Waystar Royco's annual galas. You're a friend of a friend going because you were forced to. When you started talking, you hadn't even known Connor was a Roy. He said nothing, just laughed and agreed, when you started to shit talk Logan and everything his company stood for

It wasn't until after you'd exchanged numbers did you realize, immediately apologizing for what you said. He merely shrugged, assuring you his Pops had a reputation, that he was a lot better once you met him. You doubted it, but agreed anyways

Since then, you'd been together

Connor called you the day after the gala, wondering if you were free that Friday, if you'd like to go out with him. You weren't expecting him to reach out after what you'd said, but was pleasantly surprised by the offer. Of course you would

Your first date was at this extra fancy place where you felt totally underdressed. Connor didn't notice at all, making jokes through the whole night. He listened intently and actively. At the end of the night, he was so nervous he could barely ask you if he could kiss you. You kissed him instead

Connor could be a bit oblivious to things, but he was kind, loving, he considered himself lucky you'd even looked in his direction. He was sweet and affectionate and always talked things through with you, as a couple, as one. He wanted to be sure you were on board with everything, even if it seemed a little out there or wild

Calling you honey, sweetie, sweetheart, babe, honey-bunny, etc.

You can't have Connor without his family. Being a big brother is a vital part of his life. He would be nothing without his little brothers and sister. They can be mean to him though, and that you will not stand for. You're quick to defend him and remind him that just because he loves them, it does not mean they can get away with it

"Cute date, what website did you buy them from?"

"Very funny, Rome."

You like Shiv the most. Kendall can come across as self-absorbed and Roman has a complete lack of filter, but Shiv has a good head on her shoulders. She, too, takes Connor for granted, but less so

It's not long after dating that he wants to introduce you to his father. You have a few choice words about him, but you keep them to yourself. Logan barely registers that his son is there, let alone you. After that brief introduction, you stick by Connors side desperately, wanting to get the hell out of Logan's company

When he talks about his childhood, he gets the same sad look in his eyes. You remind him that he's okay now, that you love him and you'll always be here for him. He always makes a point to take back the bad things he has to say about his father, not wanting to speak ill of a man he so admired, he so wanted to be loved by

"It wasn't all bad, I make it seem worse than it is."

"Con, I think it really was that bad. . . "

He's so affectionate. He has to be touching you always. His hand in yours, around your shoulder, waist, even just standing beside one another. He never wants to be apart from you. It's the same way when you sleep. You don't mind though, you know it helps him relax and it makes you feel wanted. Always

He tells you he loves you a thousand times a day, in a million different ways. Be safe. Call me when you get there. Wear a seat belt. Be careful. I'll miss you. Call me when you're free. I'm always a text away. He cannot stress how much you mean to him

Though he loves to show you off as fancy restaurants, Connor desperately wants to do normal things. Going to a fast food place and getting burgers and milkshakes. Going to the arcade or carnival and winning you the biggest stuffed animal there is. Going to the movies and sharing popcorn. And yes, singing karaoke. He enjoys it all so much more than any fancy place

Connor would much rather cuddle on the couch with a movie playing than take you to some club or bar his brothers would enjoy

You help him pick out his clothes for events. He's so nervous about making the right impression, so indecisive, it's hopeless without you. He even models a few options before packing it away

"This tie or the blue?"

"Blue, it brings out your eyes."

When his family comes over, you definitely have to calm him down. The house isn't clean enough or cool enough and everything is a disaster. You have to remind him that they love him, in their own special ways, and that everything will be fine. He will be fine. Most of the time it isn't, someone or something goes wrong, but you have to keep telling yourself that to keep going

A few times you've talked to his siblings about taking him for granted. They don't change their ways, but at least you're able to get it out in the open. You understand why he loves them so much. Without them, for a long time, it was just him and Logan. What a nightmare. But they could be a little nicer to him

"They're not like that."

"That doesn't matter, you do so much for them, Con."

He's a big fan of forehead kisses. He's quite tall so it just works out

Connor can be very spontaneous. You're constantly being surprised by him. Some ways good, like spur of the moment vacations, and in some ways not so good, like his idea of running for President. Regardless, you stick by his side

Everyone thinks you're with him for the money, but that couldn't be more untrue. Sure, there are perks that come with the money, but you'd be just as happy with him in a teeny tiny apartment trying to make ends meet. Even happier if that meant his father wasn't in the picture any longer

He's constantly singing those cheesy love songs to you, using a hairbrush or a fork, whatever he's got in hand at the moment, serenading you until you kiss him to stop

"L is for the way you look at me, O. . . "

Singing in the car together at the top of your lungs. You're both quite bad and off-key, but nothing makes you smile more than seeing him let himself be goofy and childish and silly

You call Kendall, Rome, and Shiv his "kids". You're always ready to jump into action if the kids need you, if there's something wrong with the kids, etc. You don't resent them for this, or him. It's just a part of the relationship you have to accept

"How are the kids today?"

"Good, good. You know them, always making jokes."

You get bits and pieces about his mother, mostly from the kids. The more you find out, the more horrified you become and the more angry you are on Connors behalf

Connor very excitedly proposes that you get a furry friend. Cat, dog, gerbil, bunny, doesn't matter. You pick something small and easy to train, knowing this is his first pet. They sleep in the bed with you. Connor Jr. you decide on, and that makes him beam

Like a proud dad, he has to show everyone every picture of them on his camera roll. It melts your heart every time he does it

He remembers the little stuff. How you take your coffee. What book you're reading and how it's going. Whose birthday it was and where you need to send flowers. How that meeting last Thursday went. He remembers everything because it's all important, it all means something

Your family, as complicated as they can be, are a lot warmer than the Roy's and welcome him with open arms. Your friends all adore him, too. What's not to love? He's a giant stuffed teddy bear

It's not always easy with Connor. He tries so hard to make his father see him, listen to him, recognize his existence, and each time, it kills him that he doesn't. You're there to soothe him to pick up the pieces. One day, you'll give Logan a piece of your mind, but you know the relationship, even one as frail as the one they have, means a lot to Connor. It means the world. You can't ruin that because your feelings are hurt for him

#requested #headcanon #connor roy #connor roy headcanon #connor roy imagine #connor roy x reader #kendall roy #shiv roy #roman roy #logan roy #succession #succession headcanon #succession imagine #succession x reader

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xxswagcorexx · 11 months ago

Note

Hey do you maybe have any lifesteal fic recs? There’s not a lot of rec lists in this fandom and I’m not sure where to start!

okay so um. i am perhaps the Worst person to go to when it comes to this stuff because. You See,

if you want a more. comprehensible list, my two swagdoons fic recommendations is probably the best place to start (1, 2). i am also going to shout out the nevada series and no bills in the mail since i've seen a few people talk about them on tumblr and i love both of them!

but i have gone through my bookmarks and have complied some fics! all of these fics are complete :)

Sweet Berry Pie by beaningeneraldenial

Clown is a busy assassin with too much experience on him to not attract a lot of potential clients and employers. One contract has him going away on the week of his and Branzy's 2nd anniversary, which Branzy doesn't appreciate much. He knows, however, how to make their anniversary celebration good! He makes a pie… he only adds a bit of gunpowder in it. or: Clown should've left a post-it note on the fridge saying "Do NOT touch, Branzy!" before he left for the week. He regrets it only a little.

Repent, Harlequin by trafficpose

The problem with knowing Clown: suddenly, chaos was an option.

Tunnel Vision by jukeboxtea

Mid is far from a quiet person. But when she’s in battle, she’s deadly silent. (or, a short character study on Midmysticx.)

Wire snare by dogdomesticated

Getting a read on intent. What will kill you first: the toxin or the detonation? A short abstract exploration of Rekrap's character and themes in Lifesteal season 3.

Rollercoaster by Thrills (IWantToRemainASecret)

Branzy compares Clownpierce to a rollercoaster and other shenanigans.

i wouldn't blame you if you turned around by Anonymous

sometimes things don't go the way you want them to. it's a story clown has heard time and time again.

What do you see when you look at the stars? by lovecore_jpg

“..What do you see?” “..What?” Planet paused, a little confused by the question. “Like– when you look out at the stars. What do you.. see? ..Besides stars?” ---------------------- Planet likes to stargaze when everyone else is asleep. This time, somebody joins him.

Olethros by arospecitzsubz (Octaveice)

"Theoretically, the ruin goes before the grace. He'd named his sword for a reason."

Brown Eyes by PacificSeaOtter

Nobody knows what color Clownpierce's eyes are- not until Vitalasy, Subz, and Rek start a bet trying to figure it out. Thus ensues the saga of failed, but hilarious attempts to get Clown's mask off.

and I swear I could slit my throat with your dull knife by Scared_Rodent

Like a frozen lake, Branzy noticed how Ashswag's expressions hardly changed, how nothing he saw surprised him at all. Branzy remembered falling in love, remembering dates by the beach with nothing but his smile. On the deadliest server in the world, Branzy remembered him.

winter in prague; 1618 by whichlights

winter in prague; 1618. tensions are high after the defenestration of multiple catholic officials, and a war will break out not quite two years later. in this time of tensions, a vampire by the name of clownpierce is injured. his friend is there to care for him, at least.

drinks in new york; 1926 by whichlights

drinks in new york; 1926. prohibition has swept across the country, but that doesn't mean the party stops. world class performers, drinks, and more- all at greenwich village, a historical hub of gay activity. clown and redd have holed up in a townhouse in the village, and have been having a wonderful time in new york.

games to play on work break by Felix_J

"A boring place is what it is. Hell." Jaron says, and it might sound a little bitter. Ash gives him a blurry look. "No, why do you look at me like that." They've stopped asking questions, (Jaron knows asking questions is not a good thing, and generally, he doesn't care). "You think, that was such a hot resort, and Satan is the greatest of 'em, you're curious, right."

A man, a squid and a clown walk into an elevator… by Thrills (IWantToRemainASecret)

Branzy is crushing hard on the dutch man he and Chief share their elevator rides with, and he seeks to learn Dutch in order to form a connection with him. Too bad he can speak English. Too bad Chief isn't going to stop Branzy.

Now as the curtains rise up by softnoblade

Maybe next it’ll snow. Maybe the remains of this server will be preserved, frozen under layers and layers of snow and ice. Perhaps, decades from now, some unlucky archaeologist will stumble across the remains of this server, and simultaneously uncover both the preserved remains of war and the immortal beings that had slaughtered them.

def function (singularity): by Anonymous/np13

it's always why did you mess with your player data and you're missing half your data structures and never ‘how was playing with your data. messing with code looked fun was it fun’ (it is, right up until it's not.)

sunsets on powerlines by w_nter

It starts with a broken lightbulb in his hands, or maybe in a forest, or maybe in a cabin tucked deep in the woods. (or: a purpleduo + the darkest minds au)

bona fortuna by sinoptics

The god of chance enjoys a visit to the human realm.

throw a punch by vanivanilla

there’s not much to do in prison, or: planet and jaron have a brief conversation as they reset their hunger

In Moments Alone (In His Office, With Pillows And Tissues) by Clownsplin

Although his outward appearances suggest otherwise, Clownpierce's moments alone are filled with stiff joints, aching muscles, and tear-stained cheeks. He gets small moments throughout the day when his pain lessens, even if by an infinitely small amount.

atlantis by Anonymous

Planet is stuck in a space between life and death, waiting. (A million miles away, Jaron is in the same position. A couple of feet away, Bacon had tried to run. Turns out there's not a lot to do when you can't respawn without being immediately killed)

farewell to the port by Anonymous

The day Branzy becomes a pirate he wakes up on a small island somewhere in the Caribbean, drunk out of his mind and distinctly lacking shoes. He thinks, somewhat despairingly, that he really should not be gambling again anytime soon. or, The Golden Age of Piracy, and the situations and decisions that drive people to become outlaws.

lose the battles by Felix_J

"you lost." it states. unless there are any more tricks up planet's sleeve, which there shouldn't be. but planet... is a strange one. "thanks." they say, and that's right, that is a full blown smile. krow still can't figure out exactly how planet's expression works, but this piece shines out, same as his eyes shine. "thank you." planet repeats, like they're not sure krow heard, or do know it can't exactly believe its ears.

Phantom in Your Foyer by arospecitzsubz (Octaveice)

Half the damn crowd had been cheering.

Kiss me in the corridor, but quick to tell me goodbye (You say that you're no good for me) by Mx_Artemis

Ash is no stranger to evil, nor is he a stranger to ClownPierce. Honestly, is it such a crime that he wants to catch up with him?

The immortal and his assassin by Thrills (IWantToRemainASecret)

He opened the door without any theatrics, no slow creak open or dramatic swing wide, he simply opened it like he was an old friend visiting a familiar face. And- Hold up, that is a familiar face. The soon-to-be-dead man was sitting on the edge of his bed, eyes shut as he slowly sipped at his cup of tea. He opened his eyes lazily, half-lidded gaze settling on Clown’s face in a way that made him feel as if he had been drenched in freezing cold water. Because he had killed his man before.

no hard feelings by sinoptics

“Hey, Redd,” Clown starts as he reaches Redd, voice ever so slightly out of breath, and then he pauses awkwardly. “So.” “So?” Redd repeats, confused as to where this is going to go. “Our arrangement is off. From now on.” Clown states. What the fuck.

or; the fic in which Clownpierce fumbles not one but two bad bitches

anything you say can and will be held against you by Felix_J

It's funny to see how Red tries to process the little things and guess if they belong to Ash, or Ash's persona that doesn't differ from him as much as he thinks, or maybe much more so, or just things Ash makes up. Ash likes to add a lot to the last pile. Poke around, like a little challenge, reminder he's not all that easy. Currently, with the fucking fish. roses and smoke week, day 6: aquarium | fantasy

For that star trapped in your chest by dogdomesticated

Thunderclouds. Stuck waiting around for Vitalasy to show up, Subz goes down a line of thinking he's been avoiding, and by then it's too late. Something about trust, something about defining what you can't see. Light, and where to find it.

The Boy and The Forest by BearAndHoney

As the tale goes there is a boy who wants to be king adn loved. And as the tale goes there is a forest full of mysteries that one else has been brave enough to explore.

the fox's young master by Felix_J

He finds a fox in the forest, dark fur-broken leg, and it reminds him, as it always does. He takes it home to fix it up, and it doesn't matter if it's just a mindless creature, if. To pass its time, he tells it a story. roses and smoke week, day 3: myths | gods

foreguess by Felix_J

I'd never go on dates just like that, after being married so long, you know that, Ash? Red'd move his head on the seat, and he wouldn't be able to see his eyes through the sunglasses. What's even the point of that kinda date? He would continue, not really ask, because of course he has to poke and argue, it always goes in a loop. Even though he knows, and he agrees with Ash. Thanks, Red, Ash'd answer and break it, because there'd be something in his stomach that's so soft, there is. roses and smoke week, day 2: swap | horror

predictable shows by Felix_J

"I'm rewatching the footage for the auditions, yeah." Red nods, slack. He considers picking the remote from his hands to push unpause, but doesn't think Ash won't find it a serious offence and make it end up on the floor in a corner at all. or, "one of them is lying" boosfer + swagdoons swap. roses and smoke week, day 2: swap | horror

The Mourner by Anonymous

The mourner stands in the open, partially hidden in the smoke. Holding out a bouquet of roses as they wait for their loved on to return.

Case #091413 - Always Bet On Red by orphan_account

Case #091413 Statement of… Branzy? No last name given apparently, about a relationship of unclear nature with someone only known as “Clown”. Dated September 13th 2014, recorded by Zachery Prince at the Institute Cordum.

little comforts by sinoptics

He turns to Vitalasy then, who’s tending a pot on the stove. “Hey, uh,” He starts, and Vitalasy makes a hum of acknowledgement. “Zam could probably use some affection.”

Mutual Hell by Kappuccinokat

Mapicc exhaled, frustrated, and stood up, walking over to the empty window. Zam tried not to relax too much. “I’m assuming this is hell, then.” He drummed his fingers on the window sill. “That’s what I gathered, yeah.” — Or; Zam had lost it all, and now as he awaits his fate in hell, a familiar face threatens to break his resolve.

Homemade Headache Cures by ros_is_writing

“Vitalasy,” Subz announced. “I can’t fucking see, and it fucking hurts.” He emphasized his point by knocking his head against Vitalasy’s shoulder, the metal of his armor hurt slightly. Vitalasy made another sympathetic noise in the back of his throat and bumped his chin to Subz’s head. Normally their head bumps were comforting to Subz, but now they just made his head hurt worse. Damn these fucking glasses.

Siren's Song by KingdomKey

The Phantoms are a renowned pirate crew who sail the seven seas. Their ship comes across a rocky island, and as they carefully traverse it, they come upon a strange creature. It certainly isn't friendly.

sweet dreams i'll always share with you by Anonymous/cutthesky

Red can transform into a plush version of himself (a big Minidoons). Shenanigans ensue one day as Ash and Red wait to fall asleep.

Cut it Out by Anonymous

He always had Ro and his knife, didn't he?

Lifesteal > Eastside > Create a Posting by bloodynocturne (avoxutopia)

Craigslist has always been an odd place, a collection of people in the same place; selling, buying, searching, looking to give or take something. And sometimes, there's small connections. People searching for each other in a circle, narrowly missing one another every time.

Southbound by ros_is_writing

“We could always use the above ground station,” Planet said in the same tone of voice that they used before. Nonchalant, bored even. Like they hadn’t just suggested an actual crime. “No.” Bacon said immediately. “That’s illegal.” “What’s illegal?” Jaron asked.

Poopies' Fun Day in the Hypixel Pit by rainy_writez

With the end of Lifesteal season 4, Poopies the endermite (who is still here somehow because it defies the mere concept of law) has become restless. So Spoke takes it to the Hypixel Pit for a fun day of incomprehensible violence. Surprisingly, Poopies ends up leaving with a new friend… or maybe more?

losing by B0LTZ

take a breath, spit out the blood in your mouth, and get back up on your feet. you still got a couple of motherfuckers to prove wrong

see with your two eyes by Felix_J

He's not a god, because the flag Red sails under doesn't believe in gods. And then he's wrong. In the reasoning, not the other thing.

carry me to tomorrow by Anonymous

Ash chooses to trust himself to the unwavering night.

mixed media: flesh, electricity, bone by Anonymous

“Do you think we’re friends in other universes too?”

(hello) my old heart by Anonymous

What he doesn’t ask is why Ash chooses, over and over, to step through that door, through Lifesteal and Earthbound and the wastelands of an apocalypse. The void knows how many other worlds they’ve followed each other through without a second thought.

fun activities to do with the person you're stuck under house arrest with by oneirogen

Open heart surgery doesn’t even rank up high in the number of weird shit he’s done on this server. Maybe approaching the top tens, if he's being generous.

smile for the camera (repeat and do it over) by gin (tabanthas)

You’re an ally and an enigma at the best of times. At the worst, you are a challenge. You are never, never a friend. OR: rek and his trust issues <3

divine intervention by Anonymous

"If we went through this all again," he says, and it sounds so far away. "Would we still find each other?" (Less than a metre away, Jaron stares at the sky. To his side, Bacon looks at the rubble by their feet. Even when you know it's coming, the end still feels like a loss you can't prepare for)

a parting of clouds by genesis_frog

What do you say, after all of that? Subz and Zam's first conversation after the sign room.

there will be darkness again by genesis_frog

Zam has been in the Eclipse Federation nearly a month now. Subz is getting more and more obvious by the day. Vitalasy steps in.

let me hold it lightly by genesis_frog

It’s a quiet life, outside the world border, but it’s one Zam and Subz have made for themselves.

to the previous respondee: by orioncataclysmic

IMAGE: more bolded comic sans. This time, it’s held up by washi tape, patterned with dicks. It reads: i like war and death and asthma attacks and if you don’t you’re a bitch and your moms a hoe OR: a battle of wits, told through an apartment corkboard, messages between Zam and Mapicc, and glimpses into Mapicc and Bacon's lives

Steam Heart by enderpearlnecklace

After sneaking onto an airship full of pirates, Branzy tries to find a way to escape.

Dear Diary: Today, I killed someone by Fey_wilde

Squiddo prides herself on her excellent memory. It’s one of her only positive attributes, one she can count on in nearly every situation. In just a blink of the eye, she can recall a story, an adventure. Every single bit of data crams itself into her head, sorting into neat piles, ones she can sift through with speed and efficiency. Mobs, history, abandoned places, extinct worlds, glitches, she knows them all. Her memory never fails. Yet, no matter how hard she tries, no matter how many hours she spends lying awake, unseeing eyes staring at the ceiling of her makeshift base, she just can’t remember why. Why did I join Lifesteal?

New Years Eve by Nox_aMillion

Going to the roof was a tradition the two of them had for New Years because apparently they liked extreme parkour off a roof while fireworks actively went off. Or the privacy was nice. Something like that.

Halloween Night by Nox_aMillion

Honestly they had done everything else there was to do on Halloween at this point. They were even dressed in repeat costumes, Red as a demon and Ash as a vampire. (Yes they could be more creative but any costume was a costume.) The two had been coming back from a fear farm when Red mentioned that there was a party at this house tonight. It was nearly two in the morning by the time they got here but the party was still going strong. Parties in houses like this didn’t end until the police got there.

#mcyt #lifesteal smp #tw swearing #media.warning.swearing #anyways i am tired so.#top 10 worst things to ask core swagcore: do you have fic recs #because Oh Boy do i #anyways hope u enjoy ^_^#mailbox.core

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rawbin-hsr · 2 months ago

Note

The previous anon articulated it so well bc I just saw what they're talking about and I'm honestly confused why they thought u were saying anything wrong like 😭😭 are we sure we have the same guy here? Aventurine while yes knows what being loved feels like, he's gone through enough things and changes in life that that little frame of reference won't serve him well, especially within a romantic context bc he doesn't have ANY reference.

I read what you wrote as him not really meaning to (even reread) and yeah, he wouldn't Purposely want to be abusive to his romantic partner, but it still borders on it. What a lot of ppl get wrong is that, emotional abuse doesn't have to always mean the perpetrator is fully aware of it themself.

Maybe bc I myself have bpd, but it's so easy to see. When someone's avoiding negative feelings they have about themself (jealousy, insecurity etc) they can easily externalize this blame (and for him, that's so much more likely, it's literally a defense mechanism) or even, projecting his own view of himself on how you view him only to end up upset. (And then, the random clinginess that comes after this pushing away, why would it happen if not for trying to convince you to stay even though what he keeps doing is generally not a good thing to do in a relationship?) He wouldn't have known healthy attachment, didn't grow up with a safety net to be comfortable with that, hell, he thinks people closest to him (in canon) are sort of "tolerating" him. Are we really surprised?

Like, you never said aventurine is doing it with intent or even awareness bc yea he isn't!! He'd realize some of his actions sure, but stuff like "pushing you away" is probably shit he genuinely considers good for you, and it's not even like completely wrong he's in a high and risky position. Doesn't mean it wouldn't hurt like a mf, and I think that's the biggest tragedy of it all, because he doesn't fully realize how bad his actions are from another pov, and it's not like a single Convo can get him to understand that.

Anyway, sorry that was a lot more incoherent than I thought and I was firmly stating a lot of things bc I can pull up stuff to back my claim but ALSO bc they pissed me off if u don't like something just scroll I've been doing that for years on this app I never felt the need to go yell at someone bc I don't agree with how they interpret a character 😒😒😒😒 I hope ur feeling better, rsd sucks ass I always get so overwhelmed whenever I experience it but ur intent came across very clearly actually dw

I’m literally in tears I’m so grateful multiple people are taking the time to reassure me thank you so much 🥹🥹🥹 I was really doubting myself and my own take on him, it makes me feel so relieved I’m not the only one who has this specific take on him haha I was lowkey worrying I was a terrible person for a moment there 😭

And yes, exactly !!!! I think you were very coherent in this, in fact I think you formulated what I meant to say better than I did 😭😭 Like there’s a lot, a LOT of nuance to it !!! He never does it out of malice. He just doesn’t know any better. He tries to do what’s right and what’s best for you, he’s just… kind of not good at that because his whole perspective is skewed.

I do still think they were right that I shouldn’t have used the word ‘abuse’. It’s a very loaded term, and I think abuse requires a power dynamic, which is something I think he would try to eliminate in a relationship. Like, yes, he is a powerful man and he sort of needs some leverage to stay in control (of both his own life and his relationship with you), but I think he fucking hates the idea of being “above you” in any way. (Though to be fair he still could unintentionally create an uneven power dynamic — he’s the one mostly in charge of when the two of you interact. I think he loathes himself even more when he realises that.) I think it would be best to stick to the word “toxic” because it feels most fitting from my pov

#[rawbin]#[aventurine]#[rawbin ramble]#sorry my mind is a little bit of a mess rn #stressed about a con I’ll be attending very soon (still haven’t even finished my wig bro)#stressed about taking the train there (second time in my life I’m going on a train without parents)#stressed about the fact that I’m sick and I’m very scared I’ll be coughing at the convention (I have spent way too much money to not go 😭😭)#I’m so incredibly thankful you wrote this to me #it makes me feel so much more secure in myself and happy #I really really really appreciate it

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archivalofsins · 1 year ago

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So, that was really something wasn’t it? I bet no one was expecting all of that. @doctorbunny had been looking into all of that since our conversation on June 4.

All this from a simple inquiry- It must be surprising for those that weren’t expecting it. So, for the Mahiru lovers out there, how was it? What did you think? Is it doing super great? Is it heating up inside those heads of yours? If it isn’t yet, then how about going for seconds-

Let’s talk about ARGs! ARG is short for Alternate Reality Game. There have been many across the internet from Everyman Hybrid to The Cipher Hunt in 2016. I’d assume the Cipher Hunt is more well known. It was an international scavenger hunt attached to the American animated series Gravity Falls. Gravity Falls is a good example of ARG media overall.

A lot of the series involved breaking codes put after the end credits, playing sound backwards to uncover hidden messages, and of course taking it frame by frame to possibly discern what was coming next. This all culminated in the 2016 Cipher Hunt as a sendoff to an amazingly fun series that not only entertained viewers but prompted them to think more about how they consume and interact with media. That’s the point of every good ARG to give the audience a chance to interact with the media in a way that usually isn’t possible which allows the audience to feel like a part of the story as well.

They’re also really fun when it comes to scratching that deductive reasoning itch for those that really like to go in depth with their media consumption. When some say it’s not that deep, ARGs are there to resoundingly say not only can it be that deep, but it is. So, we’ve got the where from This Is How To Be In Love With You now let’s talk about the why?

Milgram, for all intents and purposes, can be described as an ARG. Many, like myself, concluded that the ARG aspects only went as far as our votes but it’s becoming more and more apparent that this is not the case.

Yamanaka said this in regards to Mu’s case,

“Mu-chan had a lot of specific scenes. Her character is also pretty different between her MV and her voice drama. How you interpret her character changes depending on how far you pursue this character. Even in the real world, for example with news stories regarding murder, you’d have very different opinions depending on if you just read the headline, vs when you view the whole thing, vs when you do more research on the person.”

Generally, one’s opinion of someone/something changes based on how informed on a topic they are. That is what I believe was the gist of what Yamanaka was getting at. To use Yamanaka’s example with news stories, the headlines of news articles are usually inflammatory and a reduction of the overall point of the article. This is because they seek to grab a person’s attention and give them as much information as possible in a very short span of time or as few words as possible.

In Milgram’s case, the MV’s would be the headline and the voice dramas would be the article.

However, articles aren’t that trustworthy either, news publications lie all the time and cherry pick information to better frame the point they’re trying to get across. Continuing forward with Yamanaka’s example in situations in which a murder is being reported, depending on the news outlet one could get very different framings of the situation. Be it a different framing of the victim or assailant.

This is something Milgram fans should be used to because a vast majority of them do it. It’s not much different from what many people have been doing with the Milgram theories they type up or put on YouTube. Each person displays their own unique perspective framed by their own ego and biases. So, we have the headline, we have the article, but what about that last thing?

“When you do more research on the person.”

Well, we have multiple examples of Milgram fans doing exactly that. The most recent one being the post DoctorBunny put out. It’s exactly what it says on the tin do more research compare the voice drama and the mv look out for inconsistencies key locations. Those are the ARG aspects that have been overlooked. Either for being too time-consuming, too wordy, or just going further than one expected.

It’s every fan that’s gone hey have you seen this tiny detail in this scene, please don’t bring up the socks in After Pain, hey um why did Kotoko go change clothes before going to help that girl, who’s that guy you can vaguely see in Kazui’s mv during that sort of distorted part, hey doesn’t this image resemble- and so forth and so on. That’s the doing your own research part that hasn’t been neglected per se, but it has been overlooked.

Each music video has enough information that for what may be detective work for people outside of Japan may come off as common place things or child’s play to people who live in the areas the prisoners were in before. Many people that live around where Mahiru is from probably would’ve been able to tell most of the places in her mv from a glance. See that’s the thing about common knowledge, it changes depending on where you’re at.

A good example of this is,

In the previous post DoctorBunny mentioned how I brought up the store Mahiru was outside of was a 7-Eleven.

I saw something that came off as commonsense to me, but that same thing won't be common to someone else. Not because they're uninformed but simply because it does not color their world view. It's not something they see every day so why would they be familiar with it? This is one of the reasons it's so enjoyable to see other people's opinions on Milgram from all over the world. Because those personal experiences shape how one will interact with the media.

Hell, a few years back I probably wouldn't have been able to tell it was a 7-Eleven myself, but I moved to a place right across the street from one so the colors in the corner and the outdoor setup were familiar.

This is why it's important to collaborate with others and discuss things because it can lead to new and interesting discoveries. I didn't really think I contributed much to the search since I was just around speculating stuff for the most part, but it was fun to be involved!

Now this may sound like a disadvantage for fans living outside of Japan, but it comes with its advantages. Because when someone is around something all the time it’s easier to take that information for granted. Chances are no one would really ask about why Mahiru was in these areas. After all these are everyday places, nothing special. They wouldn’t really take into consideration that these places are sort of tourist spots. Because there are a lot of places in the world that have a tourist industry but that doesn’t mean locals can’t enjoy the things connected to that too.

It wouldn’t clock as suspicious because honestly, it’s all rather normal right? People go places all the time, it’s no big deal. However, attaching these habits to that of someone we’ve explicitly been told is a murderer creates a different story. So, what does where Mahiru has been tell us about her as a person and a murderer?

Let’s start with the question that led to all of this where does Mahiru go to college? It’s not 800 degrees Neapolitan Pizzeria, the place she claims to be her university’s terrace. Although there is a possibility that they could not get a picture of the school to use and chose another location. However, there are many pictures of the campus online that they could have chosen.

I still can't fully rule out that they'd need certain permission to use that sort of image and couldn't get it.

Q.16: How did you meet your lover?

Shidou: In our neighborhood. We were family friends so that was our relationship.

Mahiru: We met eyes at the university terrace. I really felt like it was fate.

Despite all that- Mahiru's school is more than likely Aoyama Gakuin University or based on or around it. As DoctorBunny stated previously there were two schools in the area of the pizzeria.

The second one was Kokugakuin University. This school has no religious ties but seems to have some ties to Shinto beliefs. For those curious about the second school considering, it's a likely candidate for Mikoto's college. Here's its ratings, website, and a comprehensive history of the institution.

For brevity, I'll be putting both schools' information right beneath this. Mahiru's school will be first and Mikoto's possible one second. This serves a point outside of bringing up Mikoto again I swear.

20/07/15

Amane: Eh, my studies? I enjoy it. To me, studying is something I do for fun. Do you not think the same, Mikoto-san?

Mikoto: Not at all! It’s just a means to an end…… I just did the bare minimum needed to get into a good company. I actually went to an arts uni that had a pretty low subject requirement to enroll, and from there I studied curation and…… uhh, you don’t really know what that is huh. Hmm. Since your way of speaking is so mature, I keep forgetting I need to explain myself properly……

Amane: It’s fine. If there are any words I don’t understand I can look them up later. An arts university, though…… Does that mean you’re good at drawing, then? It may be a bit rude to say, but that’s rather unexpected.

Mikoto: No, not really…? I mean, I could do the bare minimum needed to pass the entrance exam though. Even though it’s called an arts uni, there’s still subjects where you don’t need to draw at all. I’m the sort of person who tries to be efficient, so I worked backwards from the job I wanted to get into and chose to study subjects like direction and management~ ……ah, I’ve done it again……

So, from this conversation we can gather a lot about where Mikoto went to college and it's shaping up to sound a lot like this place. So, good for him and his possible bachelor's degree. I say possible because he more than likely graduated at twenty-two and then got a job. So, if he started college immediately after graduating high school then that would be four years and he'd have a bachelor's degree.

However, like I said in those messages this ain't about him. Anyone with a keen eye would realize the difference in schools here. Mikoto's possible school has a 39% acceptance rate and that's a rough estimate because the school doesn't disclose its acceptance rate at all. Mahiru's on the other hand-

Whoa boy that's a smart girl a college with an 18.3% acceptance rate as of 2015 according to Google and it's not that much higher on the edurank website sitting at 19%. It's a Christian university private and in the top 50% in 13 subjects.

Notable subjects are

Physics Rank:

#42 of 274 In Japan

#222 of 1,879In Asia

#677 of 4,082 In the World

Engineering Rank:

#70 of 278 In Japan

#446 of 2,117 In Asia

#1156 of 4,624 In the World

It's a long list but most importantly-

Q.14 What was your major in university?

Shidou: Medical school.

Mahiru: Faculty of literature.

Q.04 Other than Japanese, what other languages can you speak?

Shidou: English and casual conversation level German.

Mahiru: I chose to learn Chinese in university but well... I don’t think I can go up to speaking.

"Die."

This is why Mahiru says she chose to learn Chinese because in her school English is mandatory.

I think this more than extensively proves that this is the school Mahiru was more than likely going to before being brought to Milgram. It's a rather good school overall. So, how much does a school like this cost?

Well, that's a pretty penny. A semester there in the spring time of 2019 would run a person 759,100 jpy or 5,241.06 USD. Either way this would be a difficult amount to pay on her florist job alone and she states this-

Q.15 How much do you earn?

Shidou: That’s not something you should ask other people.

Mahiru: I’m living on an allowance from my family……

So, it's safe to say the ones footing the bill for her schooling are her parents. Unlike Futa who complains about his classes saying,

"Storm Pazuzu　（＝Futa） A L L M Y C L A S S E S A R E S O D U L L.

W A S T E O F M Y S C H O O L F E E S.

Storm Pazuzu　（＝Futa） Everyone else there is an idiot so it’s boring"

Mahiru is never shown complaining about the cost of her tuition and with a semester price that high well she should be. This coupled with,

Q.05 Did you have a good relationship with your family?

Shidou: Yes. It really was a family as happy as you could dream of.

Mahiru: I think I was what they call a "sheltered girl". I'm thankful to my mom and dad, but perhaps they were a little strict.

Q.17 Tell us about your dating history.

Shidou: I don't remember much but, I had one girlfriend in kindergarten, and in elementary school I had two relationships. I started going out with my wife in the 2nd year of middle school, and we've been together ever since.

Mahiru: I attended a girl's middle school and a girl's high school, so I didn't date anyone until I started university.

From discovering Mahiru's school we've discovered several things. Her family is financially well-off, probably not as well-off as Mu's but maybe around the same area. Given the similarities in upbringing that Milgram has felt necessary to drag to the forefront in regard to these two characters this trial.

Her parents were overprotective, maybe a bit smothering. So, as a kid Mahiru more than likely didn't have much room to go out on her own and experience certain things such as dating.

We've learned that she chose to learn Chinese but more than likely does know English given this school's curriculum. Something that was heavily alluded to throughout "I Love You" not only through the song but the cd casing as well.

Look at her nice english/romaji handwriting of her name in comparison to the others. What nice penmanship!

"Clothes Food Shelter + Love and Miss you." - "Clothes Food Shelter - Love and Miss you."

Let's get subtracting, shall we?!

What do I mean by that well let me explain. Notice anything weird about the words inside the cd case?

Clothes food Shelter + Love and Miss you.

Certain words have been left in lowercase. Also, English is a very fun language where certain symbols have double meanings. The "+" symbol has been used to supplement for "and" just like "&". This is possibly yet another ARG element. To be precise, a code that Mahiru has put into her song. A fairly simple one at that. She tells us how to solve it within her song lyrics. Yep, that's why I highlighted those plus and minus signs. Basically, I believe we're meant to subtract the lowercase words from the uppercase ones to get the real message.

"Clothes Shelter + Love Miss. food and you."

This would basically be read as, "Clothes, shelter and love miss. Food and you."

When Star sent me the image of the cd case that was my first thought after hey why are some not capitalized. So, the next thing anyone would think is Gunsli that makes zero fucking sense what does that mean? Oh, but it does make sense. Let me run it down for you. However, for that we're going to have to go all the way back to This Is How To Be In Love With You.

Where we see Mahiru go through her hierarchy of needs just as she lists here.

"Clothes, shelter-

"Do you really think you know what love is? If you do, let’s just overheat together the things that I only want to say to you, and the things that I want from you- Is love."

and love-

"If you don’t hug me, even our hearts will start drifting apart. I pretended to be a good girl, but really, I don't want to say "I'm ok"."

Then with I Love You added into the mix,

"My love, it scored an own goal, destroyed my love and me with its weight."

miss."

And that's a miss folks! An own goal is a term used in soccer or football to describe when a team scores in their own goal.

"Own Goal noun- (in soccer) a goal scored inadvertently when the ball is struck into the goal by a player on the defensive team."

In contrast, who's the one that has always been associated with food-

"Food and You." - "Tell me, oh tell me why, can’t I just do it right."

20/06/08

Mahiru: Shidou-san…… you’re really good-looking. Personally, I think you’d be better if you ate a bit more, but you’re slim and tall, and well put together to boot…… You must’ve been super popular up until now, right?

Shidou: ……yeah, that’s true…… I did my share of fooling around in the past.

Mahiru: Oh~? That's not the sort of answer I'd expect from you. I've got it! Somebody told you that if you replied like that people wouldn't resent you as much, right?

Shidou: Haha, I’m surprised you guessed. ……it seems that no matter what guise I put on, it’s meaningless against a woman’s insight.

Mahiru wants some meat on those bones~ Well, everyone has a type, and he was looking rather thin before she started feeding him.

Go on eat that up, it's good for you! That's all I could really gather from that though. However, it's a fun little tidbit if true.

Now the second point of interest I wanted to discuss from the information gathered was The Imperial Palace Run.

WHOA BOY THAT'S AN ATHLETIC GIRL!

One Lap is Five Kilometers (3.1 miles)

The distance of the route is just the right length for running. The path is also beautifully paved and there are no traffic lights at intersections, so you can run without breaking your pace. There are slight hills in about three sections of the course. These moderate ups and downs will create a satisfying change of pace during your run.

The Imperial Palace Runing Route is a five-kilometer route that loops back in on itself. In the video provided in DoctorBunny's post the area Mahiru is running in the opposite direction of is at the beginning of the run. Basically, runners start running in the direction of the sign she is running away from. As she is running away from it this means Mahiru has completed at least one five-kilometer run.

Given the lack of people Mahiru and her love probably went in the morning which is the recommended time for runners to go to not disturb others and be able to run as fast as they like. This explains why the sidewalk is mostly empty. However, runners are still encouraged to run in a straight line together and not side by side to be considerate of others. This explains why he is not next to her as she is running behind him.

I don't know about you but running for three miles over hilly terrain doesn't sound like being bad at exercise to me. Mahiru also says,

"I've never run so much in my life."

So, they very well may have done multiple laps around the area. However, it can at least be safely discerned that Mahiru has finished one lap around. So, she gets to beat the stupid and weak allegations today good for her or bad depending on your point of view. Because you know what this means, right?

"How could weak little Mahiru, someone who could only complete a five-kilometer run, ever move a body", is beginning to sound really weird. It's not surprising that Mahiru would say she's bad at exercise. Mahiru has consistently stated she's bad at everything, it doesn't mean it's true. She just lacks self-confidence and repeatedly diminishes her own abilities. Most recent example,

Q.15 Have you contributed to society?

Shidou: I had thought my work was a contribution to society.

Mahiru: I don’t think that there’s anything that I can say with confidence.

Discussing Mahiru and looking into all of this was a lot of fun! I was happy that I could be helpful! I really didn't know how much I helped until the post was put up. To me it just felt like hanging out but ya know in a good way considering certain revelations that may not have been the best phrasing ha, ha...

I was really impressed by all the creative methods DoctorBunny searched for information and I never thought such a small inquiry would lead to so much. I feel like we've learned so much about Mahiru and a little bit about Mikoto along the way~

I hope my insights on this can be enjoyed as well as I've kind of been holding off on saying anything for a good while now. I also hope I didn't rush DoctorBunny into posting too much. Also, I would recommend looking up walking around videos on YouTube of your you may be pleasantly surprised by what you find. The running route one kind of dropped me down the rabbit hole and I ended up looking up some for my city just to see what they were like.

They're calming.

#milgram #shiina mahiru #kayano mikoto

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